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attic monster brought to justice

Discussion in 'The Great Outdoors' started by BowtieBlazer, Nov 30, 2004.

  1. BowtieBlazer

    BowtieBlazer 1/2 ton status

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    Okay, so its a known fact that i have critters in my attic. A squirrel. I've known about him since march. Focker comes in through a rotten out face board on the side of my house. (rent house) Well this fluffy tailed rat is chewing and digging through my ceiling tiles and pissing me of...I have tried....

    a) the PETA approach
    tapping on the tiles, please Mr. Squirrel go away, or i'll have to get a friendly trap

    b) the arcade approach
    load the paintball gun with a full hopper and watch him run frantically run for the nearest cover, until he figures out he better exit (he disappears and you soon hear about 3 jumps on the roof overhead and he has crossed all 75 ft of it....)

    c)the pissed approach
    loud music and drum to metallica "one" on the wall(paneling its LOUD)

    so from here I can resort to

    1)yum, squirrel dinner
    snipe him with a .22 short, but then i have to crawl all the way across my attic to get his bloody ass, or he rots ....not to mention maybe a blood stained tile, I mean come'on blood seaping through and when you climb in my attic it already looks like a indoor paintball field (a side result is I'd have to go in the backyard and get a few more to make it worth it)

    2)Let him keep at it
    then one night I will wake to see ninja squirrels all over everything in my house, eating [censored], nesting, getting jiggy with it on the counter tops (you've seen the "Clusters" cereal commercials)


    well tonight I resorted to #1)
    MUG SHOT
    Showed him! dressed him out and he's in a crock pot till lunch tomorrow. gotta love a .22 with some rat shot. /forums/images/graemlins/waytogo.gif
     
  2. BowtieBlazer

    BowtieBlazer 1/2 ton status

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    yummy! /forums/images/graemlins/deal.gif

    Yummy
     
  3. Thunder

    Thunder 3/4 ton status

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    MMMMMMMMMMMMM squirrel stew. A fitting end for the evil beast.
     
  4. rubbinz raczn

    rubbinz raczn 1/2 ton status

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    too far north!
    yuk! /forums/images/graemlins/ignore.gif
     
  5. HarryH3

    HarryH3 1 ton status Author

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    A $30 air rifle from Walmart will dispatch him cleanly and quietly. Be quick and not even much blood will get on stuff. /forums/images/graemlins/whistling.gif
     
  6. surpip

    surpip 1 ton status

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    man squirrls are tough it took me 15 shots with my badass pellet gun to take down a squrril once, but with the same gun i got a jackrabbit with one shot....... might have been a fluke /forums/images/graemlins/thinking.gif
     
  7. Pookster

    Pookster 1/2 ton status

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    Please specify which make and model-

    You think your squirrel is bad, I've:

    Banged, and yelled.
    Pleaded.
    Poked it.
    MACED it.
    Tried poking him with a knife.
    Finally ended up puttin a pellet in his ass. He has since stayed away.
     
  8. Thunder

    Thunder 3/4 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]
    Finally ended up puttin a pellet in his ass. He has since stayed away

    [/ QUOTE ]
    Dont be fooled. He is talking his time and plotting his revenge. Be afraid. Be very afraid!

    Squirrels are evil. Behind those beady eyes lies a heart of pure black.
     
  9. Pookster

    Pookster 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    i've always said.. squirrels are just rats with better marketing.
     

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