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Best Fourwheeling one liners...Please add your best

Discussion in 'The Garage' started by gzzgfw, Apr 21, 2004.

  1. gzzgfw

    gzzgfw 1/2 ton status

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    Sitting here on the job, it comes to mind some of the best one liners I have ever heard.

    "It was so fast that it would pass everything but a gas station"

    "It wouldn't pull a mule if it was going backwards"

    "It's not that deep"

    "Mud tires?, Them are for rich folks w/ visa's"

    "It ain't never been stuck"

    Add the best you've ever heard....
     
  2. juanblzer

    juanblzer 1/2 ton status

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    hey, hold my beer and watch this
     
  3. miniwally

    miniwally 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    I bet that thing will climb anything

    And my personal fav. While driving your Truggy/Buggy/not easily identified rig
    NICE JEEP /forums/images/graemlins/yikes.gif
     
  4. CyberSniper

    CyberSniper 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    Some that I've heard but aren't mine:

    "bigger tires don't make you smarter"
    "if dimples make a golf ball go farther and fly straighter dents aught to do the same for my truck"
    "who needs paint... just keep scratching it up and it'll never rust"
    "speed kills... use my Ramsey"
    "i'm not burning oil... I'm fogging for mosquitoes"
    "you're right... it's not horsepower per liter it's ricer crushed per tire"
     
  5. zakk

    zakk 1/2 ton status

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    *point to GF* "Follow her..."
     
  6. JK5

    JK5 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    I said this last time I wheeled with some Jeepers!!!

    "It's Really a K5 thing....sit back and watch!!!" /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif
     
  7. Burt4x4

    Burt4x4 3/4 ton status

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    It doesn't look too bad! /forums/images/graemlins/hack.gif

    There will be "Go-Arounds" so don't worry /forums/images/graemlins/yikes.gif
     
  8. BadDog

    BadDog SOL Staff Member Super Moderator Author

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    My favorite to accurately place someone in the "clueless" catagory...

    "My truck (or My old/other truck) will go *ANYWHERE*!"
     
  9. Pookster

    Pookster 1/2 ton status

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    "paint is just lubrication between your fender and the tree."

    "Use your strap, I dont want to get mine dirty."

    "That snorkel might have been a good idea."

    "Where's my spotter?"

    "Pile up those rocks....."
     
  10. gjk5

    gjk5 3/4 ton status

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    "I've tried to get this Isuzu stuck, and I just can't!"
     
  11. Bhintz

    Bhintz 1/2 ton status

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    "[darn] thats not even deep" three hours later we were out and my moms dumbass friend with a Mercedes suv saying "hey your going offroad can I come and take my mercedes, the sales guys told me these things are as good as those hummers offroad"
     
  12. 84_Chevy_K10

    84_Chevy_K10 Banned

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    From another member's sig line:

    "Stuck? Hell no I still got gas left."
     
  13. Ryan B.

    Ryan B. 3/4 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    Real show trucks are used & abused.

    No dents, no scratches, no proof.

    God forgives. Rocks Don't.

    /forums/images/graemlins/k5.gif
     
  14. fortcollinsram

    fortcollinsram 1/2 ton status

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    "DO IT MAN"
    "You can make it...EASY!!!"
    "Dude, I think you're stuck"
    "I think you broke somethiung"
    "OOPS! thats not good"
     
  15. pauly383

    pauly383 Daddy383 Staff Member Moderator

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    Yes thats MY 4x4 truck, and NO I won't help you move /forums/images/graemlins/k5.gif
     
  16. rcurrier44

    rcurrier44 1/2 ton status

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    "Life begins ware the pavement ends"

    Stole it from Ted Nugent (?SP?)

    Girlfriend got me a license plate bracket that says "if you can read this - roll me over" upside down /forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif
     
  17. Derf00

    Derf00 1/2 ton status

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    "The only thing 4 wheel dive is good for is getting you stuck in a more inaccessible place." My father.

    "My body used to look like yours till I got a Detroit in the front end and I thought I could go anywhere." Toby Harrell
     
  18. LlanoK5

    LlanoK5 1/2 ton status

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    "Skinny pedal always wins"
    Overheard as somebody in an unlocked Jeep was trying an
    obstacle .

    "Let the air out of your tires, and you can back right out there"
    Onlookers talking to a guy in a 2wd dually with a
    snapped driveshaft /forums/images/graemlins/ignore.gif.

    Kirk
     
  19. sled_dog

    sled_dog 1 ton status

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    "my 2wd can go anywhere your 4wd can go, I just need a running start" - some random moron talking to me about my K5
    "lets go rockcrawling" - my response

    "my truck has never gotten stuck" - an idiot with a stock F150 5 minutes before I stuck it in a mud pit

    "what about those other 2 times on the farm?" - his friends 10 minutes after I got it out

    "your Blazer would fit through here" - riding in the back of a jeep with trees smacking both mirrors... at the sametime
     
  20. CyberSniper

    CyberSniper 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    [ QUOTE ]
    "The only thing 4 wheel dive is good for is getting you stuck in a more inaccessible place." My father.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    My Dad said something very similar last September. We were about 10 miles from the nearest civilization taking my parents sight seeing when I decided to drive across some water that I had just been through two weeks earlier and was only about 2' deep. I knew something looked a little different. /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif Well, it'd gotten a little over 4' deep and there was now a current. When I dropped into the water it went up the hood. I kept going. I didn't even have time to turn off the electric fans. Fighting the current was nearly impossible so I headed across the stream (around 80') instead of going diaganol because I knew it was about 8" more shallow over there. I had to keep the momentum up to keep the wave going so I didn't get a wet distributor and suck water in the intake. It required me to run into a stump and a couple logs. I made it.

    When we got to the other side my Mom jumped out of the truck, lit up a cigarette, and started pacing. My Dad got out, lit up a cigarette, and told me that it was a good thing he didn't forget his blood pressure medicine. I popped the hood, pulled the sticks off the headers and leaves off the intake, and let the truck idle for a while.

    I said, "So, want to head back across or find an alternate path?"

    My Dad said, "There's no way in hell we're going back across there. I don't even like the idea you want us to go down a trail that you haven't been down in a long time by ourselves in the middle of nowhere. I swear, kid-o, the only reason we put the lift and lockers in this truck is so you could give me a heart-attack and get us stuck in an unbelievably inaccessible spot".
     

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