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Blonde

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Z3PR, Feb 3, 2003.

  1. Z3PR

    Z3PR Banned

    Joined:
    Mar 30, 2002
    Posts:
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    Location:
    Everywhere
    > Two blondes froze to death in
    > a drive-in movie? They went to see "Closed for the Winter."
    >
    > ***************
    >
    > Bambi (a blonde) goes to the local novelty shop and finds a
    > pair of x-ray glasses. She checks them out, and isn't fully
    > convinced, but as usual, the store assistant comes along and
    > closes the deal. On her way home, Bambi puts on her new x-ray
    > glasses and, bingo! She sees everyone in the street naked. She
    > takes them off for a moment, and everyone has their clothes on.
    > Puts the glasses back on...everyone is naked!
    >
    > "Cool!" As she arrives back home, she is eager to show her new toy to
    her
    > husband, but can't find him. She goes up to the bedroom and finds her
    > husband and the young woman from next door naked in bed. She takes the

    > glasses off, and the two are still naked.
    >
    > She put them back on, and they are still naked. Bambi then says:
    "Darn,
    > I just paid fifty bucks for these and they're already broken!"
    >
    > *****************
    > A blonde hurries into the emergency room late one night with
    > the tip of her index finger shot off. "How did this happen?" the
    > emergency room doctor asked her.
    >
    > "Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied.
    >
    > "What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by
    > shooting your finger off?"
    >
    > "No, Silly!" the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and I
    > thought: I just paid $6,000.00 for these breast implants, I'm not
    > shooting myself in the chest."
    >
    > "So then?" asked the doctor.
    >
    > "Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought: I just paid $3000.00
    > to get my teeth straightened, I'm not shooting myself in the mouth."
    >
    > "So then?"
    >
    > "Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought: This is going to make
    > a loud noise. So I put my finger in the other ear before I pulled the
    > trigger."
    >
    > *****************
    >
    > Did you hear about the near-tragedy at the mall? There was a power
    > outage, and twelve blondes were stuck on the escalators for over
    > four hours.
    >
    > *****************
    >
    > A blonde was driving home after a game and got caught in a really
    > bad hailstorm. Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she
    > took it to a repair shop. The shop owner saw that she was a blonde,
    > so he decided to have some fun. He told her just to go home and blow
    > into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out. So,
    the
    > blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing
    > into her tailpipe. Nothing happened. So she blew a little harder, and
    > still nothing happened.
    >
    > Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you
    > doing?" The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her

    > to blow into the tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.
    >
    > The roommate rolled her eyes and said, "Uh, like hello! You need to
    roll up
    > the windows first."
     
  2. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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  3. TONYP

    TONYP 1/2 ton status

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    Location:
    so cal
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  4. ChevyDrivnRdneck

    ChevyDrivnRdneck 1/2 ton status

    Joined:
    Nov 25, 2002
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    714
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    Location:
    Modesto, Ca
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