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Equal Opportunity Employment

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by TITAN, Nov 3, 2002.

  1. TITAN

    TITAN 1/2 ton status

    Dec 7, 2000
    Likes Received:
    Equal Opportunity Employment

    An old blind man looking for a job is having a friend of his read the paper to him one day, when they happen upon an add for a counter person at a local lumber yard. He explained to his friend that before he lost his sight that he was the foremost expert on wood in this area and that he could not doubt fill this position. So he heads out for the lumber yard.

    Upon arriving at the lumber yard he asks for the manager, and tells him that he wants to place an application for the position that was available at the time.

    The manager said that he would be more than happy to accept the application but that his handicapped would limit his ability to perform the task and that there was very little chance of him being hired.

    The old blind gentleman asked for him to give him a chance, he told the manager that although the he was blind, the good lord compensated for his loss of sight with a good nose and he could feel and smell wood and tell what it was as good as any man with sight.

    Hearing this and being a fair man, the manager said “I’ll make you a deal, I will go out to the yard and retrieve a several pieces of wood in various lengths and widths, and if you can guess all of them accurately the job is yours.”

    So the manager comes back in a bit with some wood and hands him the first piece.

    The old blind man smelled it very carefully, and rubbed it a few times. “This is a 1X2 piece of treated redwood, 4 foot long.”

    In amazement the manager told him that he was correct and handed him another piece.

    The old blind man smelled it very carefully, and rubbed it a few times. “This is a 2X4 piece of pine, utility grade, 5 and ½ foot long.”

    Frustrated, and amazed after going through every type of wood that the lumber yard had to offer, the old blind man was never wrong. Thinking that he would try and throw the old man a curve ball, he convinced his secretary to take off her panties and rub a piece of wood up and down the crack of her a$$ as well as her private. He handed this piece of wood to the old blind man.

    The old blind man smelled it very carefully, and rubbed it a few times. With a confused look on his face he smelled it again and again; rubbing it until finally a smile came on the old mans face. “I thought that you fooled me mister, but you can’t fool this old nose of mine. Why that there is a piece of wood off of a shithouse door on a tuna boat!”

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