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Everyone on ColoradoK5 read this, It may be about you....

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by uglychevyZZ4, Sep 1, 2004.

  1. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    Ok, this isnt easy but bear with me.
    ColoradoK5 is a place I fell in love with 2 years ago, all of it, and the people too, people here are for the most part down to earth and good eggs. It didnt take long for me to come across some "a$$holes", or so I thought. I have been through alot since I found this site, almost watching my wife n child die, to alot more, but the one thing that I havent been through is figuring out why CK5 is full of a$$holes when my life is going crappy /forums/images/graemlins/dunno.gifOr so I thought...

    Well, once again I was amazed by the awsome people here becuase there was a member paying attention to me, i dunno why but they were, and tried to mention a disorder to me 1 year ago. But I wasnt hearing it..

    Well turns out they were right, and Ive had to go through hell to prove him wrong. it was suggested to me that I "flip out and go off the deep end almost instantly and unexpectantly and stay there for weeks", I thought the fu**er was nuts /forums/images/graemlins/angryfire.gif well he wasnt, he was correct and Ive had to almost lose my new wife to find that out. turns out after much searching and testing and meds to see what if anything helps.........
    That Im Bi-Polar, very Bi-Polar, and Ive never been tested for anything before this, im pissed, I dont like it and I still dont know all the ins and outs of this cr@p but it is so.

    I have alot to learn about it and how to get to a level surface that I thought everyone else was needing, and somewhere in the process of being out of my fu**ing mind I have hurt alot of good people /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif and didnt have any idea, after some trials on some meds seems I look back and see I was a lunatic /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif .after this I will be taking a break from 4x surfing and spending at least the next year learning how to manage my life while dealing with this ugly chemicle imbalance, and then maybe ill make it back but i expire in 7 days and will leave it for an unknown time, but need to clear a few things up, my side of the street is messy.I need to make some public apologies and I DONT EXPECT FORGIVNESS ,but I wont turn it down either...

    Leadfoot067-sorry I flipped out on you in that pm, or anything else I did, i truly had a ball wheeling with you and everyone else, Im sure I totally screwed that up and Im sorry it was out of my control.

    trustyk5-my apologies, ive been an ass a few times to you.

    smurfmobile-same as what i said to leadfoot, and anyone else in the group i offended.

    basicly the whole pacific forum- (except Blueknight, yer still and loser, and im nuts, BUT theres meds for me /forums/images/graemlins/woot.gif)

    55willy- well, we made up, then i attacked you again, my apologies.

    Im sure there at least 20 other people that Ive been an ass to or attacked and flipped out on, for that there is no way to change it but I can apologise, I love this site and I hope I make it back with a level functioning head/forums/images/graemlins/usaflag.gif
    Rob
     
  2. chevyfumes

    chevyfumes Court jester

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    Watch for the muzzleflash!
    Good luck and hope you get well soon Rob, mental illness is no different then pysical illness... /forums/images/graemlins/waytogo.gif
     
  3. mountainexplorer

    mountainexplorer 1/2 ton status

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    Hang in there. It's always hardest to see something wrong when it's yourself.

    I've never been offended by anything you've said/done. But I hope everyone understands.

    I hope that everything goes well, and that you and everyone close to you can get through this easily.
     
  4. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    Please, dont tell me to get well soon, thats the last thing I want to read /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif but I guess it isnt any different than cancer since its out of my control to stop it, I can only learn to handle it and try to balance out the old hemoglobin with some meds. maybe I better borrow your new title /forums/images/graemlins/screwy.gif
     
  5. Corey 78K5

    Corey 78K5 1 ton status

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    Takes some sack to spill the beans like that. I do hope You get it all straitened out /forums/images/graemlins/deal.gif /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif
     
  6. Bubba Ray Boudreaux

    Bubba Ray Boudreaux 1 ton status

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    The challenges we face are for a reason and if we succeed, we become better and stronger people because of it.

    One must have confidence in their abilities to overcome and faith in their desire........................

    Stay strong and let the ones who love you by your side......................

    /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif
     
  7. jac6695

    jac6695 1/2 ton status

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    Good luck dealing with that.
     
  8. DBLAZER

    DBLAZER 1/2 ton status

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    hey bud, this will be a tuff road, but it can be run. I have dealt VERY closely with this for years. Part one of the battle is knowing you have this illness. Part two is seeking help and getting the right meds. Part three is staying on the meds. That will be the hardest part. You will start to feel great, hey I don't need these any more and here you go again. I have experienced this first hand many MANY times now. (Close family member and close friend)

    Think of it like this, the meds are like being locked in and in four low. Unlock the front and you can maybe get where ya need, but ya slam around alot.

    If you ever want to talk, or just vent, feel free to PM me. ( I know you don't know me but sometimes a goodear is one that will doesn't know those around you) You can get through this and learn to live with it. Overcome!!!!

    Nash
     
  9. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    The apology list has been edited, and to those Ive forgotten, just assume your included, Imay have forgotten/forums/images/graemlins/dunno.gif
     
  10. 84gmcjimmy

    84gmcjimmy 1 ton status

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    I haven't known you for very long, but you seen to be a good guy /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif

    I dont mean to sound like the ck5 idiot, but what is bi-polar?
     
  11. hi pinion

    hi pinion 3/4 ton status

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    Its ok man, everybodys got some crap going on with themselves,or with family,etc.Me included. Whoever thinks they dont have problems is living a complete and utter lie,witch is the worst way to be in my opinion.Its the ones who are just so perfect and better than everyone that i cant stand.Everyone has issues and things going on,dont worry youre not alone .It was for me kind of a turning point for me not too long ago where,everyone said i was an [censored],i was rude, etc,but before i thought na, its THEM, not me.But when more and more people said i had an *attitude* the more i stopped and realized,do i? I do.I need to change this, so i am less of an ass now, i think. /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif I =Jacob, am working on not being an [censored] to people. /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif Pm me anytime if you want.Some of the *key* members here no one would suspect had problems/personaliy issues too.There is a saying i read not to long ago that really stck with me good.....= If you always do what youve always done,,,,youll always get what youve always got. Anyway, good luck with your deal man, everyone has them, including me./forums/images/graemlins/waytogo.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif Jake **
     
  12. chevyfumes

    chevyfumes Court jester

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    [ QUOTE ]
    bi-polar?

    [/ QUOTE ] He likes sex with the North or the South... /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/ignore.gif
     
  13. beater_k20

    beater_k20 Banned

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    Rob, i'm going to agree with Corey. it does take alot of sack to post up a public appology, even more so when its something you cannot control. i have recently done something very similar on another board that i frequent. the only real difference is that it is my own fault. yes, you have said a few things in the past to me that many may have taken offensive, but i take it as what it is, just words posted on the internet. i would almost bet that if you put any two members in a mud hole, or on a trail, they would overcome their differences very quickly and have a good time.

    mental illness is never an easy thing to deal with, i too have friends and at least one family member who have dealt with it. my biggest advice to you is to do what the doctors tell you, they know what is best in the longrun. keep on the meds, and keep a hold on things, and you'll be just fine. i wish you the best of luck. /forums/images/graemlins/waytogo.gif
     
  14. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    its a dumb name, its the new PC term for the old term "manic-depressive". meaning that a person suffering with this has a chemical Imbalance of the brain, a chemical thats not getting produced or just insufficient (( at least all my other junk works, maybe thats where its going /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif)) and causes a reaction that usually is like a rubber band, going from very hyper happy and just insanely high, to angry, bitter, depresed or whatever low in a matter of seconds, there are brain chemicles that belong in-beetween those reaction, which Im missing aparently /forums/images/graemlins/screwy.gif /forums/images/graemlins/dunno.gif best explaination I can give without pasting a page I been reading.
     
  15. 84gmcjimmy

    84gmcjimmy 1 ton status

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    woah that is really to bad /forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif Is there something you can take to stop it? good luck brother /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif
     
  16. mosesburb

    mosesburb For Rent Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    Hang in there man.

    DBLAZER about summed it up (with a good analogy too). I have seen a few people go through this and what he says pretty much hits the nail on the head. I have read alot of your posts over the past couple years and from what I read, with some of the crap you have dealt with in your life, you definitely have what it takes to get a handle on this. Hell, just admitting it the way you did takes a bunch-o-stones right there.
    Take the time you need to get to where you want to be. We'll still be here when you get there /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif.
    Good luck, and while I can't speak for everyone, I look forward to seeing you back here when you are ready /forums/images/graemlins/waytogo.gif.
     
  17. Resurrection_Joe

    Resurrection_Joe 1 ton status

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    Hmmmmm

    Eh [censored] it, you still rock hard, hard like 6000 watt Metallica Master of Pupputes era. You are the Call of Ktulu.

    Anyway, it's good that you're not using it as an excuse

    I don't really know you, so that was pretty general, but well, hell, I so love the world

    "So shines a good deed in a weary world"

    Only slightly relavent but I like WW quotes
     
  18. backcountry

    backcountry 1/2 ton status

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    Rob,

    I am totally impressed with your honesty. It takes a big heart to address these issues in this fashion.

    I am sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed with such disappointing news. The good news is now you know that there is an issue and you can be treated for it.

    As a Firefighter, I respond to every medical call imaginable. Besides treating the immediate life threatening medical needs, I spend time talking to patients that tell me they have been diagnosed by their Doctor that they have a particular disease. I find that patients often struggle with issues like yours in the form of depression just because of the label. Please note that regardless of what you have been labeled with that you are not alone.

    I myself am a very avid backpacker and just been recently diagnosed with asthma. I never thought it would happen to me. I eat very well, exercise everyday, don’t smoke and drink very little. Man, I tell you what! Some days I become bummed just thinking that my life has forever changed.

    From what I understand, your disease is very treatable. I know a few people in my area that have been diagnosed as Bi-Polar as well. They are very good people and are working very diligently to address this issue.

    I’m sure you are doing as I am. Researching as much as possible to try and understand what the heck is going on. I have noticed that I have been able to cope much better by gaining knowledge alone. Being able to reflect back on my life experiences helps tremendously as well.

    Anyway, good luck and best of wishes to you and your family! /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif
     
  19. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]
    You are the Call of Ktulu.

    [/ QUOTE ] I never got stoned enough to really get that song, but it rocks, it was my brothers favorite song.
     
  20. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    ok, you guys keep asking so here is a page that might sum it up fast what exactly it is... scroll down too and read the chart of symptoms /forums/images/graemlins/crazy.gif
    web page
     

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