Top Ten Signs Your Amish Teenager Is In Trouble > > > > 10. Sometimes stays in bed until after 5 a.m. > > > > 9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women > > without bonnets. > > 8. Shows up at barn raisings in full "KISS" makeup. > > > > 7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Thou sucketh." > > > > 6. His name is Jebediah, but he goes by "Jeb Daddy." > > > > > 5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I'd listen to > > rap." > > > > 4. You come upon his secret stash of colored socks. > > > > 3. Uses slang expression, "Talk to the hand, 'cause > > the beard ain't listening." > > > > 2. Was recently pulled over for driving under the > > influence of cottage cheese. > > > > 1. He's wearing his big black hat backwards.