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How to convince a bullheaded man?

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by jekquistk5, Aug 10, 2006.

  1. jekquistk5

    jekquistk5 Weld nekid Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    Ok heres the deal, my g/fs dad is a very hard working blue collar guy. He builds trailers, and does misc steel, and repair jobs out of his pole barn. He also works on semis and other vehicles. The problem is he is very bullheaded, and has the possibility of collapsed spine. He can only work for 5 min then gets in so much pain he can't work, and has to take vicodin. He sometimes looses feeling in his arms and his fingers, hence spine damage.

    The problem is he is so freakin stubborn(now I see where his daughter gets it from) that he will not have surgery, because he doesn't want to be paralyzed if something were to go wrong. He says he would rather work and be in pain until he dies then be a tomato the rest of his life. Heres the catch though, he has a greater chance of being paralyzed if he continues to work, but so far he will not believe us on the statistics.

    How have you guys delt with a stuborn individual before. I'm thinking on taking him a whole book of stuff to prove it to him, but he will probably not listen, he always has to do things his way. Just like the time I told him the way he was welding was wrong....boy did I hear it then. He is a genuine good guy, with a good heart, but he is completely oblivious to the real world.
     
  2. Skigirl

    Skigirl 1/2 ton status

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    Actually he may be right. There are many other, often better options for back pain than surgery, which often does not fix the pain. Hands and arms going numb is not uncommon when the brachial nerve group is pinched, which is also common.

    Unless he has had a nerve cut or partially cut, or a broken back, I would pursue other options first.

    There is a physician in Milwaukee named William Faber, at the Milwaukee Pain Center, that has done incredible work with spinal problems and back pain, non-surgically.

    A really good chiropractor can also often fix what you describe, and sometimes these conditions can be self treated after the right combination of physical therapy, muscle relaxants with anti-inflammatories and exercise.

    If he has a degenerated disc that is casuing the porblem, there are also procedures now that can replace the disc with a synthetic one, and other procedures that fix herniated discs that are non-surgical.

    I would see if you could get his agreement to let you research other alternatives than surgery for helping fix his problem, with the understanding that if you find some potentially viable non-surgical options, he would need to pursue ones that look hopeful so that you aren't wasting your time.

    So look at: physical therapy, chiropractic, prolotherapy, disc replacement (which is surgical but not intrusive or paralysing).

    This is a great page for information on all types of problems. Look at Brachial Plexus injury, then scroll through the other back pain related stuff. There's explanations and illustrations of the injury, rehab exercises and treatment plans. What is described on the rehab sections is usually what physical therapists help with or have patients do, so no reason why he can't do a lot of this himself with some prodding and nagging.

    But I would leave the nagging to his daughter. Dads have a harder time resisting their daughters. BTW, I would probably have his daughter talk to him about your research too, from a "I want my Daddy to be OK" perspective.
     
  3. jekquistk5

    jekquistk5 Weld nekid Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    edit didn't see the link

    thank you soo much this helps a lot
     
  4. Skigirl

    Skigirl 1/2 ton status

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  5. jekquistk5

    jekquistk5 Weld nekid Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    So those doctors actually know something at u of m... I didn't think they did cuase of the nerve damage I recieved while having jaw surgery....
     
  6. Skigirl

    Skigirl 1/2 ton status

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    Surgery and conservative treatment are two different things. Your case is a good example of why you should exhaust all non-surgical options first.

    And I'm sure that the stuff on that web page is taken from texts on the subject, so not written by those practicing at U of M.

    So the answer is no, they may still not know anything, but they didn't write that data so you're safe :D
     
  7. ntsqd

    ntsqd 1/2 ton status

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    Might also be worth mentioning just how bad Vicodins are on your system.
    I've a friend with a broken back. Broke the Titainium pins they put in his back after the break. Known far & wide as "MISF" and sometimes "dumba$$" for reasons likely guessable. Every day he treads the line btwn enough Vike to get thru the day, but not any tiny bit more than absolutlely necessary.
     
  8. 88Silverado

    88Silverado 1/2 ton status

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    WOW....are you dating my wife :what:



















    Sorry....actually it took my father inlaw to have a heart attack while he was taking a tread mill test. The docs said his heart went into ventricular defib and they zapped him back. He doesnt remember that part but after they performed a quadrupal bypass and installed the pacemaker he still thinks they staged the whole thing so the docs could just make money to make payments on their Yachts. Sometimes you can never convince them until they finally drop.
     

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