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I quit! - All you computer gurus need to read

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Derf00, Apr 7, 2004.

  1. Derf00

    Derf00 1/2 ton status

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    Actual letter of resignation from an employee at Zantex Computers, USA, to
    her boss, who apparently resigned very soon afterwards!

    Dear Mr. Baker,
    As a graduate of an institution of higher education, I have a few very basic
    expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an
    intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your
    consistent and annoying harassment of my coworkers and me during the
    commission of our duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few
    genetic wastes of our time. Asking me, a network administrator, to explain
    every little nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into
    my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen.
    I was hired because I know how to network computer systems, and you were
    apparently hired to provide amusement to myself and other employees, who
    watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of “cut and paste” for
    the hundredth time. You will never understand computers. Something as
    incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also
    never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it
    to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you
    what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.
    You walk around the building all day, shiftlessly looking for fault in
    others. You have a sharp dressed useless look about you that may have worked
    for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you pawn
    it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring
    ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae
    that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of
    the Dilbert principle. Since this situation is unlikely to change without
    you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my
    resignation, however I have a few parting thoughts.
    1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you
    to give me a bad recommendation. The most you can say to hurt me is “I
    prefer not to comment.” I will have friends randomly call you over the next
    couple of years to keep you honest, because I know you would be unable to do
    it on your own.
    2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system, and I know every
    password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I
    am going to publish your “favorites list”, which I conveniently saved when
    you made me “back up” your useless files. I do believe that terms like
    “Lolita” are not usually viewed favorably by the administration.
    3. When you borrowed the digital camera to “take pictures of your Mother’s
    birthday,” you neglected to mention that you were going to take pictures of
    yourself in the mirror nude. Then you forgot to erase them like the
    techno-moron you really are. Suffice it to say I have never seen such odd
    acts with a sauce bottle, but I assure you that those have been copied and
    kept in safe places pending the authoring of a glowing letter of
    recommendation. (Try to use a spell check please; I hate having to correct
    your mistakes.) Thank you for your time, and I expect the letter of
    recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody
    and all of your little twisted repugnant obsessions will be open to the
    public. Never f--- with your systems administrator. Why? Because they know
    what you do with all that free time! Wishing you a grand and glorious day,
    Cecelia
     
  2. ramjet gmc

    ramjet gmc CK5 Staff Staff Member Moderator GMOTM Winner

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    /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif
     
  3. Goober

    Goober 1/2 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]
    Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    ouch, that hurt. /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif


    [ QUOTE ]
    Never f--- with your systems administrator.

    [/ QUOTE ]

    Words to live by.


    /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif


    I would love to see the letter he wrote. /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif
     
  4. H0BBEZ

    H0BBEZ Registered Member

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    It's amazing how some I.T. Managers and Directors come to be. I think every I.T. professional has been in a similar situation as this letter's author.

    I remember once I was an administrator under a guy who started out as the company's Accounting Director. After finding out that he'd been doing some rearranging of numbers his access to nearly all systems was revoked. His buddy (president of the company) "promoted" him to Director of I.T. That's right, an I.T. Director who was only allowed access to the pulic drive and his home drive.

    Now I'm currently in the best job I've ever held and just found out this morning that the company has been merged into another. /forums/images/graemlins/doah.gif
     
  5. Tweetysuarus

    Tweetysuarus 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/yikes.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif
    Bill
     
  6. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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  7. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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    /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif
     
  8. R72K5

    R72K5 Banned

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    no idea what a systems administrator is but lmao at the letter /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  9. gm4x

    gm4x 1/2 ton status

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    Sounds like she's got him by the "sauce bottle"!!!
    /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif
     
  10. Goober

    Goober 1/2 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]
    no idea what a systems administrator is

    [/ QUOTE ]




    The Systems Administrator is the person who controls who gets to have access to what. They set all of the permissions on a network and/or computer. Which means that they can do and see anything on a system ... unless it's encrypted .... but we'll save that discussion for another class. /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif


    Systems Administrator = GOD
     
  11. gm4x

    gm4x 1/2 ton status

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    Pretty smart for a guy named Goober /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
    Jeep slam returned /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/whistling.gif
     
  12. Goober

    Goober 1/2 ton status

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    Dang, second day here and you're already slingin' it.

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  13. gm4x

    gm4x 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif I had a good teacher.....eh Goob??? /forums/images/graemlins/dunno.gif
     
  14. gm4x

    gm4x 1/2 ton status

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    Heck, if I could sling mud like I sling BS....I'd be king of every bog, climb, & trail there is!! /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  15. gm4x

    gm4x 1/2 ton status

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    A man was suffering from constipation, so his doctor prescribed suppositories.
    A week later, the man was back at the doctor's complaining that his constipation had gotten worse, not better.
    The doctor asked, "Have you been taking the suppositories?"
    "What do you think I've been doing," said the guy, "Shoving them up my ass?"

    WONDER IF THIS IS THE SAME GUY????????????
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/histerical.gif
     

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