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MAN SUES TOM RIDGE OVER DUCT TAPE FEARS

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by thatK30guy, Apr 16, 2003.

  1. thatK30guy

    thatK30guy 1 ton status Premium Member

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    MAN SUES TOM RIDGE OVER DUCT TAPE FEARS

    ----

    Corona, CA - Tom Ridge's advice to Americans to stock up on duct tape and
    plastic has sparked a lawsuit which has been filed against him, the
    Department of Homeland Security, and President George W. Bush. Steven J.
    Bosell, the owner of B & B Construction in Corona, California, has filed
    a lawsuit claiming emotional distress, personal injury and sexual
    dysfunction after he wrapped his "privates" in duct tape to protect them
    from a biological attack. "After watching Mr. Ridge on television
    advising us to stock up on duct tape and plastic, I went to the local
    Costco and bought $100 worth of duct tape to protect myself", Bosell
    said. "When I got home, I taped up my windows and doors. After I did
    that I realized if survivors like myself are going to reproduce and
    populate the Earth after a biological attack, we have to protect our
    privates as well." Bosell claimed in his lawsuit he wrapped his

    "privates" in duct tape as test of "Homeland Security". When he tried to
    remove the tape, Bosell injured himself when the tape began peeling off
    skin and body hair. After calling an ambulance, Bosell was taken to the
    hospital where the doctors and nurses laughed at him. "I told the
    doctors and nurses at the hospital if they laughed, I would file a
    lawsuit against them and the hospital. They laughed anyways and I now
    have another lawsuit pending" Bosell said with tears streaming down his
    face. "They went out their way to make me look like a fool. Once I saw
    the doctors scalpel go toward my privates, I totally lost it and blacked
    out". Also named in the lawsuit is the President of the United States,
    George W. Bush. "President Bush is just as liable for injury to my
    reproductive future because he hired Mr. Ridge to run the Department of
    Homeland Security and Mr. Ridge gave the nation bad advice. They also
    make me look like a fool." Bosell sobbed. The Department of Homeland

    Security and the Bush Administration have no comment on Mr. Bosell's
    lawsuit.

    We can only hope that this man's reproductive capabilities HAVE indeed
    been 'curbed'!

    Copyright 2003 - The Corona Times
     
  2. Bubba Ray Boudreaux

    Bubba Ray Boudreaux 1 ton status

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    Is this crap for real Wes? Stupid people can never stop amazing us. Cheap entertainment.
     
  3. ducttape114

    ducttape114 1/2 ton status

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    ewwwwww, ducttape sould not be abused in that way. that dumb-ass got what he deserved.
     
  4. Pure Insanity

    Pure Insanity 1/2 ton status

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    OK so what this guy is saying, a construction worker no less, that he didnt realize how damn sticky duct tape is, and common sense didnt tell him NOT to tape up his junk! /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    Ladies and gentlemen, do we have a Darwin award candidate here or what!? /forums/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif
     
  5. Goober

    Goober 1/2 ton status

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    Lucky for him Tom Ridge didn't tell him to STAPLE the plastic sheeting.

    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
     
  6. Pure Insanity

    Pure Insanity 1/2 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]

    Lucky for him Tom Ridge didn't tell him to STAPLE the plastic sheeting.

    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif




    [/ QUOTE ]LMAO! Or nail it. Construction workers have access to nail guns.... /forums/images/graemlins/eek.gif
     
  7. Z3PR

    Z3PR Banned

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    I bet <font color="green"> Red </font> <font color="red"> Green </font> would have something to say about the abuce of duct tape.
     
  8. chosen(1)

    chosen(1) 1/2 ton status

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    I call Bull****
    always remember Snopes is our friend. /forums/images/graemlins/deal.gif
     
  9. 88Silverado

    88Silverado 1/2 ton status

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    If its true...They should take that guy and his lawyer out back and remove them from the gene pool. The combination of pure stupidity (that guy) and pure greed (his lawyer) cost us (you and I) to give up a little bit more of our daily freedom because we have to protect these dumbf***s from themselves and pay some greedy SOB to defend this idiot /forums/images/graemlins/angryfire.gif

    Too bad he didnt tape up his house good enough that he ran out of air first.
     
  10. uglychevyZZ4

    uglychevyZZ4 3/4 ton status

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    [ QUOTE ]
    I bet <font color="green"> Red </font> <font color="red"> Green </font> would have something to say about the abuce of duct tape.

    [/ QUOTE ]
    /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gifRed Green is my HERO, well, next to Al Bundy /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     

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