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May Offend-Michael Jackson Funnies

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Confedneck, Nov 26, 2003.

  1. Confedneck

    Confedneck 3/4 ton status

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    Michael Jackson Jokes-these may offend you, and not that i care, but for the sake of political correctness, dont read these if you are easily offended or are into the same types of activites as King Michael.

    Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
    A. From a catalogue.

    Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book?
    A: It's called "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing".

    Q. How do you know Michael Jackson is having a party?
    A. There are a bunch of tricycles in front of his house.

    Q: What do Michael Jackson and the Detroit Tigers have in common?
    A: They both wear one glove for no apparent reason.

    Q: Why was Michael Jackson spotted at K-Mart?
    A: He heard boys' pants were half-off!

    Q. What's the difference between Mr. Potato Head and Michael Jackson?
    A. Michael Jackson has had more noses.

    Q. When is it bed time at Michael Jackson's house?
    A. When the big hand is on the little hand!

    Q. What do Michael Jackson and a jockey have in common?
    A. They both ride three year olds.

    Q. What's the worst stain to try and remove from a little boy's underpants?
    A. Michael Jackson's makeup.

    Q. What did the lady at the beach say to Michael Jackson?
    A. I believe you're in my son.

    Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
    A. One is plastic and harmful to children, the other is used to carry groceries.

    Q. What does Michael Jackson consider a perfect 10?
    A. Two 5 year olds.

    Q. Why did Michael Jackson decide to have a boy of his own?
    A. Because it's too expensive to rent them at $2 million a pop!

    Q: What's icky, brown and found in a baby's diaper?
    A: Michael Jackson's hand!


    Q: What do you do if Michael Jackson is drowning?
    A: Throw him a buoy!

    Q: What do Michael Jackson and a Big Mac have in common?
    A: They're both 44 year old meat between 10 year old buns!

    Q: What's black on the inside, white on the outside, and comes in little cans?
    A: Michael Jackson!

    Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Richard Pryor?
    A. One got burnt doing Pepsi, the other got burnt doing coke.

    Q. What does Michael Jackson reminisce about?
    A. Blowing his first nose.

    Q. Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
    A. He saw someone blowing bubbles and thought he'd join in.

    Q. Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men?
    A. He thought it was a delivery service.

    Q: Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small?
    A: Because they aren't his!

    Q. How did Michael Jackson get in trouble?
    A. He was feeling a little Randy.

    Q. Why does Michael Jackson like children so much?
    A. He knows how they feel.

    Q. What did Michael Jackson say when he got back to Neverland Ranch from drug rehab?
    A. You know, I feel like a new boy.

    Q. How do we know Michael Jackson is guilty?
    A. Several children have fingered him.

    Q. Why is Michael Jackson so tough?
    A. He can lick any kid on the block.

    Knock Knock!
    Who's There?
    Little boy blue!
    Little boy blue who?
    Michael Jackson!

    Michael Jackson asked his wife's doctor how soon after the birth could he have sex. The doctor told him he should wait until the kid is at least
    12 or 13 years old.

    The Pope has issued a proclamation on Michael Jackson. If he hears any more allegations about little boys, the Pope says he'll have no choice but to make him a priest.
     
  2. JDBlazer454

    JDBlazer454 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif

    [​IMG]
     
  3. Confedneck

    Confedneck 3/4 ton status

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  4. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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  5. 84_Chevy_K10

    84_Chevy_K10 Banned

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    Isn't that a little girl? Michael Jackson doesn't like little girls......
     
  6. chevyfumes

    chevyfumes Court jester

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    [ QUOTE ]
    Isn't that a little girl? Michael Jackson doesn't like little girls......

    [/ QUOTE ] It does look like a girl... /forums/images/graemlins/thinking.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thinking.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thinking.gif [​IMG] /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  7. mudjunkie 82

    mudjunkie 82 1 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    What is he considered,A black man,A white black man or what? The freak changed his color /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif
     

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