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Most Superior Texas Ranger of All Time

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Bubba Ray Boudreaux, Sep 1, 2006.

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Most Superior On Screen Texas Ranger

  1. J.J. "Lone Wolf" McQuade

    22 vote(s)
    84.6%
  2. Cordell Walker

    4 vote(s)
    15.4%
  1. Bubba Ray Boudreaux

    Bubba Ray Boudreaux 1 ton status

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    After hearing the music from one of the all time greatest flicks today, a thought occurred. Just who was the baddest Texas Ranger of screen history. Of course, we have two choices in this battle.

    The first contestant is Ranger J.J. McQuade, pictured below.
    [​IMG]

    Absolutely no non-sense type of guy. Didn't give a rat's ass about the bad guys' constitutional rights or their well being. It was all about kicking ass and taking names.

    [​IMG]

    Had a badass dog, house was a totally wreck and rolled in a super charged Dodge Ram Charger. Command didn't like him cause he was a throwback to the old days. The bandana, looked like he spent most of his time in the desert without the benefit of a shower and best of all, sported a flak vest.

    His mentor, Dakota was another throwback, knuckle dragging Ranger who uttered one of the best lines ever, "I'd like to bite that in the ass, develop lockjaw and be dragged the death" when refering to McQuade's future hookup with Barbara Carrera, who was also banging David Carradine, who played the super bad dude in the flick.

    He gets saddled with a partner, who happens to be wet behind the ears Kayo; a Texas DPS Trooper who gets captured by the bad guys at the first of the movie and McQuade saves his life.

    After running afoul of the feds, McQuade invades Mexico to save his daughter and kick Carradine's ass fourteen ways from Sunday.

    The other contestant in this mortal battle would be Ranger Cordell Walker. Walker is the polar opposite of McQuade.
    [​IMG]

    Clean cut, dresses well, a better representation of the Texas Rangers than his earlier character. Although he dishes out about the same level of ass whup on the bad guys, the bad guys usually survive so they can go to jail. Best quirk of Walker was to signify the upcoming whupping of bad guy ass, he would drop the tailgate of the pickup.

    Walker was socialble whereas McQuade wasn't. Walker had ADA Alex Cahill in his grasp, seen here.
    [​IMG]

    While the pure Latina hotness of Carrera could whup up on Sheree J. Wilson, Carrera's character was also weak willed, who ended up dying at the end of the movie, while Cahill was charged with kicking bad guy ass in the court room.

    On the partner front, Walker was saddled with James "Jimmy" Trivette, former Dallas Cowboy was in awe of Walker's ass kicking skills. Walker's so-called mentor was C.D. Parker, who owned the bar that they hung out at after rounding up the bad guys.

    When Walker first hit the screen, he was rolling around Dallas in a GMC, then later moved on to a Dodge pickup. Always clean, my personal choice is with the Ram Charger. Always dirty and given that "it's just sheet metal, it can be replaced" attitude of the Charger, McQuade has the advantage there...........

    So of the viewing public, who kicked more ass, J.J. McQuade or Cordell Walker??????????????????
     
  2. southernspeed

    southernspeed 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    Lone Wolf's the man. Bad ass and kicked Carradine's ass! And that bit where he cracked open a beer and drove outta that hole they buried him in.....BS but brilliant!
     
  3. Cricket

    Cricket 3/4 ton status

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    McQuade.
     
  4. gjk5

    gjk5 3/4 ton status

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    No question. McQuade.
     
  5. SkulzNBonz

    SkulzNBonz 1/2 ton status

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    That's like comparing Elvis to the Beatles, McQuade hands down.

    John
     
  6. Bubba Ray Boudreaux

    Bubba Ray Boudreaux 1 ton status

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  7. chevyin

    chevyin 1/2 ton status

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    Wow people are actually voting for Walker.
     
  8. gjk5

    gjk5 3/4 ton status

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    No Sh*t.




    Fess up you homghey wrong Ranger pickers!!
     
  9. uberbeans

    uberbeans 1/2 ton status

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    Steven Segall would kick McQuades ass.
     
  10. gjk5

    gjk5 3/4 ton status

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    Holy shart, now you did it. Chuck is gonna go Freddy Krueger on your ass tonight in your dreams.



    Don't F*ck with Ch*ck.

    [​IMG]
     
  11. Bubba Ray Boudreaux

    Bubba Ray Boudreaux 1 ton status

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    Doubtful, very doubtful.................................................
     
  12. Cricket

    Cricket 3/4 ton status

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    He's too busy beating on his wife.
     
  13. Corey 78K5

    Corey 78K5 1 ton status

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    Segall is a fat ass narcissist environmentalist who flushed his acting career down the toilet.
     
  14. beater_k20

    beater_k20 Banned

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    i would vote for Chuck Norris, but that isnt one of the options.
     
  15. txfiremank5

    txfiremank5 1/2 ton status

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    What .. no Lone Ranger option! LOL No Augustus Mcrae..

    I'd probably still vote for JJ.
     
  16. southernspeed

    southernspeed 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    The only thing in Segall's favour is that he had probably the best film prop of all time......The Mighty Mo!
     
  17. Corey 78K5

    Corey 78K5 1 ton status

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    Then again there was Captain Woodrow F. Call who could hand out an ass kicking if need be.
     
  18. Stickseler

    Stickseler 3/4 ton status

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    [FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Captain Jake Cutter would kick his a$$, Actually hed just shoot him and be done
    [/FONT]
     
  19. chevyin

    chevyin 1/2 ton status

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    I hear Napoleon Dynamite was awesome with a bow-staff.
     
  20. 78Suburban

    78Suburban 1/2 ton status

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    I voted walker, just because he's awesome in the napoleon dynamite sort of way.. and I had to be loyal to my avitar

    <<<<<<<<<<<<< :eek1:
     

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