Q. Why do women pierce their bellybutton? A. Place to hang their air freshener. Q. Did you hear Cher is joining the spice girls? A. They're going to call her Old Spice. Q. What is the difference between a clever midget and a venereal disease? A. One is a cunning runt, and the other is a running **** Q. What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? A. Yell at her. Q. What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex? A. Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak. Q. What do women and police cars have in common? A. They both make a lot of noise to let you know they are coming. Q. Why do female skydivers wear jock straps? A. So they don't whistle on the way down. Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Never mind that, what the **** is she doing out of the kitchen? Q. Why do women have 2% more brains then a cow? A. So, when you pull their tits they won't **** on the floor. Q. Why can't women read maps? A. Because only the male mind can comprehend the concept of 1 inch equals a mile. Q. What's a virgin and a balloon have in common ? A. All it takes is one prick and its all over. Q. What's the difference between your wife and your job? A. After five years your job will still suck. Q. What do you get when you cross a rooster and peanut butter? A. A cock that sticks to the roof of your mouth. Q. Why do women prefer old gynaecologists? A. Their shaky hands! Q. What is better than a cold Bud? A. A warm bush. Q. What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? A. Fur traders. Q. What do you call a virgin on a waterbed? A. A cherry float. Q. What does bungee jumping and hookers have in common? A. They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks, you're screwed. Q. How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood? A. When his hand caught on fire. Q. What�s better than a rose on your piano? A. Tulips on your organ. Q. What did Adam say to Eve? A. Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets! Q. How do you get a nun pregnant? A. Dress her up as an alter boy Q. Why don't witches wear panties when flying on their broomsticks? A. Better traction. Q. What does parsley and pubic hair have in common? A. Push it aside and keep on eating... Q. How do you say 69 in Chinese? A. Twocanchew (two can chew). Q. What is the definition of a menstrual period? A. A bloody waste of ****ing time. Q. Why is a woman's pussy like a warm toilet seat? A. They both feel good, but you wonder who was there before you. Q. What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball? A. Gagged Q. What is the Difference Between Pussy and Apple Pie? A. You can eat your mom's apple pie.