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Showering Habits - How to shower like a woman

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by mudhog, May 18, 2003.

  1. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Showering Habits - How to shower like a woman

    1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
    according to lights and darks.

    2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband
    along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to
    do more sit-ups.

    4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, and long
    loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

    5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
    vitamins.

    6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

    7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.

    8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
    until its red.

    9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

    10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

    11. Shave armpits and legs.

    12. Turn off shower.

    13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with
    Tilex.

    14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
    Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

    15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

    16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

    17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


    How to shower like a man

    1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave
    them in a pile.

    2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake
    wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

    3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire your wiener and
    scratch your butt.

    4. Get in the shower.

    5. Wash your armpits.

    6. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

    7. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they
    sound in the shower.

    8. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding areas.

    9. Wash your butt, leaving butt hairs stuck on the soap.

    10. Shampoo your hair.

    11. Make a shampoo Mohawk.

    12. Pee.

    13. Rinse off and get out of shower.

    14. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain
    hanging out of the tub the whole time.

    15. Admire wiener again.

    16. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.

    17. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife
    pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound
    again.

    18. Throw wet towel on bed.
     
  2. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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    I posted that a few months ago, but its still funnier than hell /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  3. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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    well fine so I'm like a month behind /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  4. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  5. Troopie's Tonka

    Troopie's Tonka 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/shocked.gif ...i don't get it. how'd you know that i shake my sauzage at her and piss in the shower? /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif
     
  6. 83ZZ502_Jimmy

    83ZZ502_Jimmy 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    John
     
  7. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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    /forums/images/graemlins/eek.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  8. Blaze

    Blaze 1/2 ton status

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    Every time I read that it reminds me sooo much of me. /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    My wife yelled at me yesterday for the woo woo noises, too. /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  9. LKJR

    LKJR 1/2 ton status

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    LOL, that's funnier every time I read it /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     

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