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So I have this screwdriver in my hand...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by midnitewarya, Mar 10, 2006.

  1. midnitewarya

    midnitewarya Sounds like a problem for future me. Premium Member

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    ...and I'm gonna use it to stab my neighbors dog in the throat.

    It's one of thise little Scottish terrier yappy dogs, they never bring it in, and it yaps and yelps ALL NIGHT. I can't stand it anymore, I'm going f'ing crazy. This is sick. When I was an interrogator in the army, we used to use dogs on the arabs, but the higher ups made us stop. Now I know why. I'm gonna kill it!
     
  2. midnitewarya

    midnitewarya Sounds like a problem for future me. Premium Member

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    The enemy.

    [​IMG]
     
  3. BranndonC

    BranndonC 3/4 ton status

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    soak it with water! lol... something mean but not cruel
     
  4. Cricket

    Cricket 3/4 ton status

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    Pee on the fence and mark your territory.
     
  5. midnitewarya

    midnitewarya Sounds like a problem for future me. Premium Member

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    I would, but it's supposed to get chilly tonite. I'd hate to torture it. :D

    Maybe a dog whistle. I think that would be fair.
     
  6. BranndonC

    BranndonC 3/4 ton status

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    or a bigger dog or a mean cat
     
  7. surpip

    surpip 1 ton status

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    ahh yes ****ty little dogs
    my c02 bb pistol made the neighbors dog not **** on my lawn anymore
     
  8. Rhinopkc

    Rhinopkc 1/2 ton status

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    Had the same problem once. What I did was sacrifice 1 night of sleep for many nights of quiet. Every time the dog woke me up, I POLITELY woke my neighbor up and told them that their dog was barking at something and they may want to check it out. Notice I said politely, make sure you convey much concern that maybe the dog sees something out there, that way they can't have you arrested for harassing them. They'll figure out what you're doing and most likely take the hint, if they get nasty and call the cops, you just tell the police you thought there may have been a prowler in the backyard because of all of the commotion the dog was causing. My neighbor figured it out after about 3 hours and I never heard his mutt again at night, he started bringing the thing inside so that he could get some sleep. Just don't lose your cool, I know it's hard but this is a fight you have to fight with your brain, not your fists.
     
  9. hi pinion

    hi pinion 3/4 ton status

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    That dog reminds me of my greedy yappy whiny uncle:haha:

    kick it!:haha:
     
  10. koldsimer

    koldsimer 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    I love dogs so much. That being said, get a airgun and pop the dog in the ass with a couple of pumps. It will probably run and hide and wonder how you just did that. The key is to get the dog to associate seeing you late at night holding something in your hand with getting stung by the invisible biting copper plated ball. Really, you just have to train your neighbors' dog not to bark at night. I agree with Branndon that you should probably just douse it real good but if it's gonna be real cold.... I would suggest talking to the owner but most of the time stupid ass-dogs have stupid-ass owners. Good luck, and don't feel to bad about shooting the dog. I sleep well at night now because I bb-capped a neighbors dog twice.
     
  11. midnitewarya

    midnitewarya Sounds like a problem for future me. Premium Member

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    That would work just about anywhere but here. I live on post, and somehow we got put in with the junior enlisted crowd. Not to say they are bad people, just saying that my neighbors are common white trash. It's most of the reason the poor dog spends all of his time in the back yard, in a field of it's own feces.

    And when it gets hot out, it smells SOOOO bad.

    I do have an old hand crank tornado siren...
     
  12. spongeidys

    spongeidys 1/2 ton status

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    the fact you took a picture of it makes me laugh ;D
     
  13. Rhinopkc

    Rhinopkc 1/2 ton status

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    You're on a military installation? Can't you complain to some kind of housing office or something? I was always in barracks, so I don't know how base housing works.
     
  14. thatK30guy

    thatK30guy 1 ton status Premium Member

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    What I was thinking, too. :haha:
     
  15. diesel4me

    diesel4me 1 ton status Premium Member

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    I'm a victim too...

    A neighbor has a dog 2 houses away from mine..he had another german shepard for at least 7 years he tied to a tree,and left outside for most,if not all of the day and night!..it must have finally died,(or someone killed it I would not doubt!)..but before it dissapeared,he got another mutt that must have been the first ones son..it barks incessantly just like dear old dad did..:mad:

    I guess someone must have complained about the other dog,for when the second dog came along,the neighbor built a "kennel" out of chain link fence...right smack in the middle of the yard behind their house,which is in plain veiw of at least 5 other yards including mine..now every time I walk out of my house,the dog barks,barks,barks..:mad:

    I asked the guy nicely WHY didn't he put the kennel farther back in the yard?..thirty more feet,it would have been near the trees,and its all forest beyond that..he works at a lumber yard,and has piles of stockade fence rotting away behind his shed,among many other things he probably took from work..wish he'd put it up!..

    I asked WHY he couldn't have put 3 sections of fence up around the kennel,so the dog can't see when I'm out in my yard..he simply said "I don't have time"...more like he doesent give a sh** how much it annoys others..I feel he does this intentionally,the dog certainly serves no other purpose,other than to fertilize the back yard..which his young children play in(and ride a quad endlessly sometimes too,almost as annoying as the dam dog is..)..:mad:

    This "family" also has barn burning parties often on weekends,with bonfires,beer galore,and pot smoke fills the air..none of that bothers me much..but when a tractor trailer backed a flatbed in one saturday afternoon,and a live rock band played until well after midnight,one of the others who live nearby(the cheif of police and his son are practically next door to him!..and also have K-9's that start barking when this guys dogs starts yapping),they must have put the squeeze on his parties,because only once since did the band return,and it was not more than one song into the "concert" the cops showed up!..(and no,it wasn't ME who called,even though I'd hadn't been invited!)..

    I went to school with this "neighbor",but was never a close friend..I've fixed his riding mower,had a beer with him,but we don't socialize or talk much..I
    asked him nicely quite a few times to tell the dog to be quiet..but he only yells at it from an open window a few times,and says "I guess it won't listen"...

    One night out in my garage,with its thin steel walls,the barking really got to me..I started thinking of a murder plot..hmm...maybe pour a gallon of gas on the dog and BBQ the yapping mutt!..nah,they would hang ME if I did that..plus I like animals as a rule...but hate being annoyed by yapping mutts!..

    So I decided I'd TAPE RECORD the dog barking at 1:30 am,and I taped about 15 minutes nonstop...I then looked up the phone number ,and gave my "neighbor" a call...as soon as I heard the groggy "hello" answer the phone, I hit "PLAY"...and let it run until they hung up!..:bow: :bow: ...I did this every half hour,until about 4:30 am,the neighbor calls me,(had caller ID I guess:mad: ),and tells me to knock it off!..I told him to F*** himself,if I had to lie awake listening to his dog,HE could lie awake to it too!..

    The war is still ongoing..I'm about ready to hire a hit man to take that dog out..so far,its only been outside a few days this week,but it was barking at 1:30 am til 2 am thursday...:mad: ...is it possible to go insane from listening to barking,barking,barking????...I think so!..and I wonder if I could sue him,and collect damages??...maybe I should have a lawyer give him a call..:thinking:
     
  16. midnitewarya

    midnitewarya Sounds like a problem for future me. Premium Member

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    I hear ya, that dog is out there barking right now. It never stops. Yap yap yap. All day long.

    Not too much longer now, not long at all...
     
  17. RubberFloorMat

    RubberFloorMat 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    bbgun or a .22 one of which will do the trick.


    i have a dauchshund and a german shepard, both of which dont bark unless they hear something in the middle of the night, and then if its just a car down the street or whatnot and i tell em to shut up they do...

    its not the dogs fault its the owners.
     
  18. afroman006

    afroman006 1/2 ton status

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    If its gonna get cold, douse him with the hose and make a dogsicle.
     
  19. koldsimer

    koldsimer 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    I'm telling you guys, the bb gun training method works. Yell "shut up you stupid ****in' dog" and cap it quickly thereafter. IT WORKS. Pavlov's dogs. Very little if any harm to the dog. My female roommate found out what I did and she got all pissed at me. So i let her shoot me with two pumps. I acted like it didn't hurt but it left a nice little blue circle on my thigh.
     
  20. 1-ton

    1-ton 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    You could just take the dog for a long ride and drop it off some where. It is not like your neighbors will come out to see whats going on if the dog starts barking, when you grab it. It will probably take 24 or more hours before they even relize the dog is gone.
     

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