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Some rather amusing jokes about men.

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by NoAngel, May 8, 2002.

  1. NoAngel

    NoAngel 1/2 ton status

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    How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?
    Both of them.

    2. Why did the man cross the road?
    He heard the chicken was a slut.

    3. Why don't women blink during foreplay?
    They don't have time.

    4. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
    They don'tstop and ask for directions.

    5. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer.

    6. What is the difference between men and government bonds?
    The bondsmature.

    7. Why are blonde jokes so short?
    So men can remember them.

    8. How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper? We don't know; it has never happened.


    9. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good looking?
    They all already have boyfriends.


    10. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
    A widow.

    11. Why are married women heavier than single women? Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed. Married women come home, see
    what's in bed and go to the fridge.

    12. How do you get a man to do sit-ups? Put the remote control between his toes.

    13. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
    They're all married.
     
  2. behemoth

    behemoth 1/2 ton status

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    ... so what's your point?
     
  3. Leadfoot

    Leadfoot 1/2 ton status Premium Member

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    And then.........

    Hey, I resemble that remark/forums/images/icons/tongue.gif

    <blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr>

    5. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer.

    <hr></blockquote>

    I though it was that he bought two GM trucks (a 78 and an 80) /forums/images/icons/smile.gif
     
  4. NoAngel

    NoAngel 1/2 ton status

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    ... he throws the 2 cases of beer in the truck bed and drives over the slutty chicken on his way over to the single's bar!!/forums/images/icons/laugh.gif
     
  5. Cusm

    Cusm 1/2 ton status

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    I thought you said amusing jokes, not all out slanderous remarks about them.
     
  6. riz

    riz 3/4 ton status

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    <font color=blue> Good ones ! You forgot these though .......

    How many women does it take to change a lightbulb ?
    None, they'd rather sit in the dark and bitch about it.

    Why are women's feet so small ?
    So they can stand closer to the stove.

    I'm sorry ....... I couldn't help it.
     
  7. ChevyHuny

    ChevyHuny 1/2 ton status

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    LOL that was cute. Thanks for posting that /forums/images/icons/smile.gif
     

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