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there's always someone that has a worse job than you....

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by jjlaughner, Jan 12, 2005.

  1. jjlaughner

    jjlaughner 3/4 ton status

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    Location:
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    When you have a "Horrible day at the job" , try this:

    On your way home from work, stop at your pharmacy,
    go to the thermometer section, and purchase a rectal
    thermometer made by Johnson and Johnson. Be very
    sure you get this brand.

    When you get home, lock your doors, draw the curtains,
    and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed.
    Change into very comfortable clothing and sit in your
    favorite chair. Open the package and remove the
    thermometer, being careful to place it on a table or a
    surface so that it will not become chipped or broken.

    Now the fun part begins --

    Take out the literature and read it carefully.
    You will notice that in small print there is a statement:

    "Every rectal thermometer made by
    Johnson and Johnson is personally tested"

    Now, close your eyes and repeat out loud five times:
    "I am so glad I do not work for quality control at Johnson and Johnson!"

    HAVE A NICE DAY AND REMEMBER,
    THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE ELSE WITH
    A JOB THAT IS WORSE THAN YOURS!
     
  2. darkshadow

    darkshadow 1 ton status

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    hes that guy whos always walkin funny down the hall
    :crazy::crazy:
     
  3. stallion85

    stallion85 1/2 ton status

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  4. muddysub

    muddysub 1 ton suburban status Staff Member Moderator GMOTM Winner

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    jeff i thought u were over in iraq or something, are u still here in vegas?
     
  5. boggerless

    boggerless 1 ton status Premium Member

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    dearborn heights, Michigan
  6. SubYuman

    SubYuman 1/2 ton status

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    Hey, you could have this job!!!

    Neo-Natal Pachyderm Urologist....

    What does this person do you ask?

    He circumcizes new born Bull Elephants.

    The job doesn't pay much, but you get BIG tips!
     
  7. SubYuman

    SubYuman 1/2 ton status

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    Or...

    A long term employee on fishing boats, baiting hooks for tourists and lazy fishermen.

    You start out as a Novice...

    After 6months or 150 days on the job, you become an Apprentice.

    Five years later, if you haven't grown weary of the job and it's inherently low pay and lousy hours, you become a Master Baiter!
     
  8. Cricket

    Cricket 3/4 ton status

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    Used to work at an Arabian Horse Border with an AI barn. For those of you unfamiliar with livestock AI= artificial insemenation.

    They have a dummy female horse, stand a female in heat just behind it. Vet gets up under the dummy. They bring in the stallion and let him smell the female. He gets excited, ends up mounting the dummy and the poor old vet underneath has to grab the horse cack and stick it in a big tube he is holding. After that he holds on for dear life and hopes he doesn't get poked in the eye.

    Once all is said and done he removes the goo with a large syringe and injects it into the female, yeehaaa.
     
  9. SubYuman

    SubYuman 1/2 ton status

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    AH Memories...

    We used to call the guy with that job the bull-puller....

    ATTENTION IN THE HOSPITAL: "Due to a mix up in Urology, no apple juice will be served today!!!"
     
  10. Resurrection_Joe

    Resurrection_Joe 1 ton status

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    So what kind of qualifications do you need for this job?
     
  11. Cricket

    Cricket 3/4 ton status

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    Big Hands.
     
  12. Resurrection_Joe

    Resurrection_Joe 1 ton status

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    Gettysburg, SD

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