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What makes an imported car driver, a ricer? EDIT: is this rice?

Discussion in 'Other Rides' started by 84gmcjimmy, May 20, 2006.

  1. 84gmcjimmy

    84gmcjimmy 1 ton status

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    What makes a person who drives an imported car, a ricer?

    STUPID stuff like coffee can mufflers and stuff? Or what makes them have the title of a ricer?
     
    Last edited: Jul 31, 2006
  2. sled_dog

    sled_dog 1 ton status

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    when you put a ton of work, money, and time into a car that will never be fast... Like a non turbo eclipse with a fart can. Or any Domestic car. I respect fast import cars, I work on some of them, but most of them are pieces of junk that just don't get out of their own way. When you spend 20K on a car and it runs 15 second quarter miles, and you think thats respectable... that is a ricer.
     
  3. blazinzuk

    blazinzuk Buzzbox voodoo Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    Or when you think that wing you put on the back of your car will actually help the handling. Such as (A freinds little bro told me this). "That wing gives me almost 500 lbs of down force at 130 mph" This was on a stock civic that would have a hard time hitting 110
     
  4. Z3PR

    Z3PR Banned

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    I would think down force on the rear of a front wheel drive car would would be anti preformance by causing lift on the front and loss of traction.
     
  5. cbbr

    cbbr 1 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    Basically a slang term for Asian import cars that have been modified.
     
  6. 84gmcjimmy

    84gmcjimmy 1 ton status

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    Thanks Alan, that cleared it up for me.
     
  7. BranndonC

    BranndonC 3/4 ton status

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    all show and no go.... ground effects, neon, strobes, fart cans, wings, fake things that do nothing but look ugly
     
  8. Thunder

    Thunder 3/4 ton status

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    Rice!! Its not just for imports anymore.
    [​IMG]
     
  9. Thunder

    Thunder 3/4 ton status

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    Not even the camaro is safe
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
     
  10. ratzila

    ratzila 1/2 ton status

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    You have more exhaust decibels than your engine has horsepower.

    You have aftermarket FRONT wheels for racing but stock rear wheels.

    Your engine makes twice as much horsepower as torque.

    17" rims up front, 13" out back on your FWD.

    You ever painted your wheels to match the same color of your car.

    You put your automatic car in neutral at every stoplight in order to roll it back and try to fool other people into thinking you have a
    manual transmission

    DuPont gave up trying to figure out the shade you were asking for.

    Your mod list includes stereo equipment, shifter handle, MOMO steering wheel, PIA driving lights, exhaust tip, but no REAL engine parts.

    A chameleon lizard undergoes fewer shade changes than your custom paint scheme.

    Your rims and tires are so large, that you have to install the tire / wheel from underneath the car because it simply won't fit in the
    wheel well going in from the side.

    The dealer laughs when you bring your car back in for service under warranty, and you've only had it 6 months...

    Your tires / rims stick out from the lip of your car by more than 1."

    Your paint job is from the WRONG end of the color spectrum.

    You installed spacers on your STOCK wheels and tires to get them to stick out past the fender.

    You see cars like yours in a Shriner's Parade for Children and clowns are driving them.

    You bring an empty Maxwell House coffee can with you to compare size when you shop for an aftermarket exhaust system.

    Your Eclipse GS-T hardtop has a "SPYDER" emblem on the rear...

    Your sum knowledge of suspension is: "the more negative camber, the better the handling."

    You push your car through the staging lanes. That way, maybe you can break into the 16s by keeping the motor cool between runs.

    You add a super tall rear wing, and a hundred pounds of aftermarket ground effects, neon and stereo yet you gut the interior and yank
    out the rear seat for weight savings.

    Your rear wing AND your rear window have a third mount brake light...

    The back lighting in the gauges in your A-pillar gauge pod work long before the actual gauges are hooked up.

    You cut 4 coil springs and scrape the chassis on the ground. Sparks are cool when you corner at normal traffic speeds!

    You have to find a way to drive AROUND speed bumps in a parking lot.

    You install clear corner and brake lights.

    You install colored bulbs in your aftermarket clear lenses.

    You ever put neon on the bottom of your car, and then busted it on the first speed bump you went over.

    You painted the UNDERBODY of your car to match

    If your rear spoiler is taller then you are.

    if you can fit fist **** your exhaust tip

    You have more stereo WATTS than engine TORQUE!

    If your tailpipe extension is the most expensive mod you’ve done to your engine yet.

    Your tailpipe extension fell off during a quarter mile race and you went three tenths of a second faster due to weight savings.

    EVERY car in your class has a turbo pushing double digits worth of boost.

    You spent $5,000 on the engine and you can not out run a stock Camaro, Firebird, or Mustang

    You want the 'wastegate' sound, but don't want to install a turbocharger system.

    You think Nitrous Oxide on your Hyundai Sonata puts you in the same performance league as the Chevy Corvette.

    The automatic version of your car runs 2 seconds slower in the 1/4mile.

    If the 1970 Plymouth Daytona Superbird has a smaller spoiler than your car does.

    You think the Del Sol is a sports car...

    A torque converter does NOTHING for your car.

    You think a deep farty noise = the sound of high performance

    If you think that horsepower is far more important than torque

    If you have ever claimed that switching to a cone filter has given you more than 5 HP.

    If you have ever considered installing more than one set of fog / driving lights.

    If you claim that the aftermarket cold air intake system you just installed doubled your horsepower or took 2 or more seconds off of
    your E/T.

    Your baseball cap is always on backwards when you drive (the first sign of mental retardation, wearing your clothes backwards... BE).

    You spent all night on the Internet trying to find a company that makes a turbocharger system for your Hyundai...

    If you removed your side view mirrors and put them at the TOP of the door / window frame.

    If you think the Fugees are 'speed' music.

    MOMO is 'absolutely required' to go fast.

    Your four cylinder has a dual exhaust system installed.

    Your four cylinder has four exhaust pipes ("Hey, one for each cylinder!")

    The color of your interior upholstery hurts the cones and rods in other people's eyes.

    If you cannot drive your car in snow as the ground effects create a plow effect.

    If you have installed driving lights to compensate for headlight blackouts / tape.

    If you think that 180 horsepower and 185 lb/ft of torque are impressive for a ‘mildly’ modified engine.

    If you have stickers on your car for parts that you could not point out if asked where those parts are installed.

    You think pushrods are a bad thing…

    Your car has more decals than you do the quarter in seconds.

    Every Honda you EVER owned, all the way back to your 1978 Accord was either a V-Tec or a TYPE-R.

    You took your rear seat out and gutted your interior for weight savings but you installed 400 pounds of electronics, neon, DVD, Sony,
    etc.

    If you gutted the interior to save weight on a car that you will never take to the track…

    You lean your seat so far back when you are driving, that every time you hit a bump, its your back and not your butt that hurts.

    You have hydraulics and sixteen switches on a car you claim runs low 10s on the street and corners better than a Porsche.

    If you can estimate that your car makes more than 250 HP without ever running it at the track or getting a dyno reading.

    You claim that you can get a titanium block for your engine.

    If you have ever thought Hyundai and "performance" went hand in hand

    If you've ever gone to a parts shop or speed warehouse and asked for a 1" to 6" exhaust adapter...

    If you've ever contemplated adding "TYPE-R" stickers to your Sonata…

    If you've removed more than 1/2 of the coils from your springs by cutting them yourself ...

    If you have more neon lights on your car than a strip club...

    You put Kanji on your Ford ZX2, Ford Probe, or Mercury Cougar ...

    You own a "TYPE-R" Hyundai or Mazda.

    You couldn't afford headlight masking, so you just painted them with flat black Krylon and it's peeling. Badly.

    You claim that polishing your intake gave you 5hp.

    You own a V-TEC Hyundai or Mazda (especially a V-TEC rotary engined Mazda RX-7)

    You have neon INSIDE your car or in your ENGINE compartment

    You ever claimed that high gas mileage made your car superior in performance to V8s.

    If it takes you 8000rpm to reach 30mph from a dead stop at WOT.

    You think yellow plastic interior trim makes your car cool

    You spend $500 for a giant hand welded tube for a muffler with the weld marks extremely visible

    If you paint your drum brakes to simulate Hi-po calipers

    If you install fake hi-po caliper / disc simulators

    You have a front wing.

    If you lower your car and add ground effects but retain the stock 14inch wheels with disc style wheel covers

    If you equate the sound of performance with the sound of a Weed Eater™

    If you think bolting a fake muffler to one side to simulate dual exhaust is cool

    If you think colored head lights work better

    Clear tail lights and turn signals. They’re colored for a REASON!

    If you take mom's 4 door Honda accord and do any kind of mod to it

    You drive a Ford Escort station wagon with Kanji, wide tires, and Limp Bizkit stickers on the rear hatch

    You claim you lost the race because you had a passenger in the car.

    You claim how if you went from a roll you would have beat him.

    You claim you lost because you missed a shift... and your car is an automatic.

    You claim you lost because he must have been on the juice..

    Flying past the person who is 10 car lengths in front of you after they have put on their brakes.. and claim a victory.

    after losing you flip your opponent off... rev your motor and fail to break the wheels loose even around a corner.

    Tell everyone about how you lost the cop because of your "driving skills."

    you are a white kid driving an import.. wear baggy pants/hat turned around, walk with a fake limp and end every sentence with "yew
    know wha I'm sayin? Relate."

    Your idea of aiming a handgun is raising your arm over your head, pointing the gun away from you, and then just letting your wrist fall
    to the side to where the gun is almost sideways ...

    drive around in a $20,000 import with $10,000 in mods.. and still live with your parents.

    You can relate to every line of the song "Pretty Fly For A White Guy" by the Offspring

    you take offense when I say.. "your sister is like your car.. small, tight and hard to get into."

    You are a skinny, backwards hat wearing, dog chain wallet, 2 ft wide pants leg, Limp Bizkit looking white boy fag with a badly applied
    peroxide hair color treatment and temporary rub-on tattoos!




    You've spent more on graphics and decals than you have in gas, for the whole year

    You sound like you're going 90, but you're creeping past 25

    You upgraded to the "big bore" 2 inch exhaust

    You lose 2 mpg by installing a body kit

    Your wing is so large that if you go faster than 65, your bumper drags

    You think "displacement" is something that happens to homeless people

    Yugo's give you a run for the money

    You continuously run red lights because they are invisible thru your red window tint

    15's are considered HUGE rims

    You can reach back and defrost the rear window by hand

    You will race anyone, anytime, and already know that you will lose

    You think Moby is one of the greatest composers of our time

    You spend all your money pimping it out because spending money to make it faster is a waste

    Your little sister is the only one impressed with your car

    When you win a race, you don't really win, it's just that the other guy felt soooo sorry for you

    You think your mom's Corolla is fast

    The cross section of your exhaust tip is bigger than the contact patch of your tires

    Your aftermarket tach is bigger than your fist

    You bought the big ass tach to try to scare off the fast cars

    But all it does is let people know how hard you have to push it to exceed the legal speed limit

    You rev on school busses

    Hell, you rev on people in electric wheelchairs

    You buy and install custom rims a pair at a time

    YOU REALIZE THAT ALL OF THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND YOU STILL THINK YOU'RE COOL!!!

    You've entered a 12 step program called "How to come to terms with your limitations"

    The bill of your hat gets caught when you roll the window up

    You really want to kick my ass right now

    You cut 2" holes in your rear bumper and don't know what they're for

    You cut 2" holes in your rear bumper and DO know what they're for

    You go to the auto paint store and pick out the most retina burning color you can find

    You buy race gas to drop you from 17.02 to 16.9 in the quarter, and then tell all your friends how fast you went

    You add a second battery to power all the neon, and the mini disco ball

    You add a wing on TOP of your car, 'cause wagons need down force too

    You've ever painted bare, raw fiberglass black and said "Look! It's just like carbon fiber!"

    You get pimped out props from the mini truck crowd

    You still only get dates from high school girls

    You actually own a pair of light up glasses from Checker Auto

    When you install your super phat wing, you put the pointy ends up

    You purchase and install a body kit, one piece at a time

    You saw the "Rice Boy" magazine in the back of Sport Compact, and inquired about a subscription

    Your brother is pissed cause you stole the muffler off his dirt bike (it was a direct fit!)

    Your dad is worried cause you bought a car with less displacement than his lawnmower
     
  11. 1BadK-30

    1BadK-30 1/2 ton status

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    :rotfl: ahahhahaha i allmost spilled my water all over the place man that makes me laugh so hard
     
  12. Avery4jc

    Avery4jc 1 ton status Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    I just lost 10 minutes of my life that I cannot get back, nice going ratzilla!

    -Avery
     
  13. Jonny-K5

    Jonny-K5 1/2 ton status

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    IMO ricer is a 4cyl compact FWD cars with mods from wild to mild. bone stock i dont consider them ricers. gotta at least have a coffee can exh. idont care if its slow or fast, still a ricer. now if its a 6cyl, RWD or 4WD, or any other combo, not a ricer. for instance, Mazda RX7, Nissan 300zx, Subaru WRX. gotta be compact fwd 4cyl.
     
  14. k5blazin

    k5blazin 1/2 ton status

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    You guys like my little rice burner? It ran a 12.5 @113 mph last week at cecil county... havent really touched the motor yet. You guys tell me.. honest opinion, is my car ricey?

    [​IMG]
     
  15. Z3PR

    Z3PR Banned

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    That doesn't look riced out. You don't have a giant wing bolted to the trunk, I don't see hundreds of stickers. I can't see your exhaust tip, but from what I can see, I wouldn't think you'd have a fart muffler with a coffee can exhaust tip.
     
  16. k5blazin

    k5blazin 1/2 ton status

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    I do have a 3in. exhaust because its turbo.. but it doesnt sound ricey at all. I also only have 3 stickers on my rear window for the car forums i belong to.. Ive gotten alot of compliments on the car from domestic owners. Now its time for me to build a 4x4:waytogo:
     
  17. 84gmcjimmy

    84gmcjimmy 1 ton status

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    What year of car is that? What forums you belong to? Nice 240sx :bow:
     
  18. k5blazin

    k5blazin 1/2 ton status

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    Its a 1990. I am on Zilvia.net rarely just to buy stuff mostly. I am on a local forum called turboforum.net, and im a moderator on pa-nissans.com. Im thinking about getting out of the import scene because of all the B.S and expensive parts.... maybe building a supercharged LS1 to put in somethin. Ive had k5's since i was 15 and i love them.. Thanks for the compliments :D
     
  19. huntingaddict

    huntingaddict Registered Member

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    car

    I agree that your car is tastefully done and that the 240's can truly be fast cars.
     
  20. ratzila

    ratzila 1/2 ton status

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    Is a 95 Chevy Cavalier a ricer if it has a humongous surf board type wing mounted on the trunk?:haha: I wish I had a camera passing that POS:doah:
     

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