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Who said cops don't have a sense of humor

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by 55Willy, May 15, 2002.

  1. 55Willy

    55Willy 3/4 ton status

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    Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

    "Take your hands off the car, or I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

    "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

    "Can you run faster than 1,200 feet per second?" (In case you didn't know, that is the average speed of a 9 mm bullet fired from my gun.)

    "So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"

    "Yes Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh ... did I mention that I am the shift supervisor?"

    "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again, or I'll give you ANOTHER ticket."

    "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not: 'Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?'".

    "Fair? Fair? Listen,.... fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and step in monkey poop."

    "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

    "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

    "Just how big were those two beers?"

    "No sir we don't have quotas anymore. We used to have quotas but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we want."

    "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours. At least you know someone who can post your bail."
     
  2. StoneyK5

    StoneyK5 1/2 ton status

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    Re: Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    Got this in e-mail this morning and sent it to a few cops that I know../forums/images/icons/laugh.gif
     
  3. muddin4fun

    muddin4fun 3/4 ton status

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    Re: Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    <blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr>

    So you don't know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?"


    <hr></blockquote>


    That's my favorite! LOL!!
     
  4. behemoth

    behemoth 1/2 ton status

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    Re: Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    .... I kinda liked "...can you run faster than 1200 fps?". LOL !!
     
  5. riz

    riz 3/4 ton status

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    Re: Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    <font color=blue> Good ones !
     
  6. ChevyHuny

    ChevyHuny 1/2 ton status

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    Re: Who said cops don\'t have a sense of humor

    I liked all of those, Im going to send it to a friend of mine who is a NY police officer. Hell just love that.
     

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