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Why did the chicken cross the road? Funny, trust me! SLMAO!

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by NoAngel, May 1, 2003.

  1. NoAngel

    NoAngel 1/2 ton status

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    Location:
    Northampton,MA
    GEORGE W. BUSH
    We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

    AL GORE
    I invented the chicken.. I invented the road. Therefore, the
    chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.

    COLIN POWELL
    Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite
    image of the chicken crossing the road.

    HANZ BLIX
    We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

    MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq ambassador)
    The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete
    fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.

    SADDAM HUSSEIN
    This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
    justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it

    RALPH NADER
    The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

    PAT BUCHANAN
    To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

    RUSH LIMBAUGH
    I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about
    your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.

    MARTHA STEWART
    No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

    DR. SEUSS
    Did the chicken cross the road?
    Did he cross it with a toad?
    Yes, The chicken crossed the road,
    But why it crossed, I've not been told!


    ERNEST HEMINGWAY
    To die. In the rain. Alone.

    MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
    I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

    GRANDPA
    In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
    Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

    BARBARA WALTERS
    Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.

    JOHN LENNON
    Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

    ARISTOTLE
    It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

    KARL MARX
    It was an historical inevitability.

    VOLTAIRE
    I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.

    CAPTAIN KIRK
    To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

    FOX MULDER
    You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more
    chickens have to cross before you believe it?

    BILL GATES
    I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

    ALBERT EINSTEIN
    Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move
    beneath the chicken?

    BILL CLINTON
    I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

    COLONEL SANDERS
    I missed one?
     
  2. heavy4x4

    heavy4x4 1/2 ton status

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    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif

    Those are all really good.
    Especially like:
    [ QUOTE ]
    GRANDPA
    In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road.
    Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
    COLONEL SANDERS
    I missed one?


    [/ QUOTE ]
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  3. Stickseler

    Stickseler 3/4 ton status

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    You forgot Baghdad Bob

    "There are no chickens on our roads, we have killed all the chickens and eaten them"
     

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