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Wife 1.0.....part 1

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by tunedportk5, Jan 20, 2005.

  1. tunedportk5

    tunedportk5 1/2 ton status

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    Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

    I can't seem to keep
    Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

    Thanks,
    A Troubled User.

    ______________________________________

     
  2. tunedportk5

    tunedportk5 1/2 ton status

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    wife 1.0....part 2

    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:
    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under
    Warnings-Alimony-ChildSupport. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

     
  3. tunedportk5

    tunedportk5 1/2 ton status

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    wife 1.0....part 3

    However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

    WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported byWife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

    Best of luck,
    Tech Support
     
  4. mr_beer

    mr_beer 1/2 ton status

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    You poor bastard, I feel sorry for you:frown1:
     
  5. big_truxx

    big_truxx 1/2 ton status

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  6. unclematty

    unclematty 1/2 ton status

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    WTF!!!?????
     
  7. eclipse

    eclipse 1/2 ton status

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    thats awesome I've seen that before :D
     
  8. scrappyk5

    scrappyk5 1/2 ton status

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    i have never seen it , awesome !!!:haha: :haha: :haha:
     
  9. southernspeed

    southernspeed 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    Been there,done that. Oh hang on...still doing that!:grin:
     
  10. big_truxx

    big_truxx 1/2 ton status

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    did the wife 1.0 and going to end up running girlfriend 7.0 again in the near future :grin:
     

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