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You Know You're a Redneck When...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by 88Silverado, Jun 19, 2003.

  1. 88Silverado

    88Silverado 1/2 ton status

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    Quartz Hill, So. Cal
    You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    1. You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

    2. You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.

    3. You burn your yard rather than mow it .

    4. You think the Nutcracker is something you do off the high dive.

    5. The Salvation Army declines your mattress.

    6. You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.

    7. You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

    8. You come back from the dump with more than you took.

    9. You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table .

    10. Your grandmother has Ammo on her Christmas list.

    11. You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

    12. Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.

    13. You have used a rag for a gas cap.

    14. Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does .

    15. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

    16. You can spit without opening your mouth.

    17. You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

    18. You have a complete set of salad bowls, and they all say Cool Whip on the side.

    19. The biggest city you've ever been to is Wal-Mart.

    20. Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV .

    21. You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

    22. You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-Mart.

    23. Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings you home.

    24. A tornado hits your neighborhood and does a $100,000 worth of improvement.

    25. You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.

    26. You've asked the preacher, "How's it hangin'?"

    27. You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
     
  2. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  3. mudhog

    mudhog THEGAME Staff Member Super Moderator

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  4. Topdown

    Topdown 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    I have been guilty of #:
    1 - drunk
    2 - drunk
    4 - drunk
    5 - sober /forums/images/graemlins/blush.gif
    7 - drunk
    9 - sober & drunk
    13 - sober - mostly
    16 - drunk
    18 - sober
    20 - sober (the 27" console didnt work but it was a great table)
    23 - drunk (sober once (or twice) too... /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif)

    damn I miss college... /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif
     
  5. Don

    Don 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    If your father's wife is still in the 6th grade
    If you bathe with flea and tick soap
    If you have 2 non working washing machine's in your backyard
    If you can tell a person's gender, by how many teeth they have left
    If the whole town show's up for a party, and they're all your relation
    If you thought Clinton was a good ole southern boy
    If you thought Dukakis was really that tall
    If you thought the new show mr. personality was great
    If you hang out at the barber shop collecting hair
    If you shoot off firework's yearound

    You might be a Redneck



    if
     
  6. Muddytazz

    Muddytazz 1 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  7. Beast388

    Beast388 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/thumb.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  8. JDBlazer454

    JDBlazer454 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    1. When your tires cost more then your truck does.
    2. The value of your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas is in it.
    3. You painted your truck camoflauge thinking the cops can't see it.
    4. Your porch falls and kills more then 3 dogs.
    5. People always ask to hunt in your front yard.
    6. People are always mistaking your junk for a yard sale.
    7. Ever parked your camaro in the top of a tree.
    8. Ever been too drunk to fish.
    9. Your mother keeps a spit cup on the ironing board.
    10. Mowed your lawn and found a car.
     
  9. mudgition

    mudgition 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    ...If your momma doesn't even take the marlboro from her lips before she tells the state patrol to "Kiss her a$$". /forums/images/graemlins/ignore.gif
     
  10. Confedneck

    Confedneck 3/4 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    you post pictures on CK5 of a blazer slaughtering a horse and then ask opinions on it...
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  11. Stickseler

    Stickseler 3/4 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    [ QUOTE ]
    you post pictures on CK5 of a blazer slaughtering a horse and then ask opinions on it...
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif

    [/ QUOTE ]
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/grin.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  12. 70~K5

    70~K5 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    [ QUOTE ]
    If you shoot off firework's yearound



    [/ QUOTE ]
    Hey what's wrong with that? /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif
     
  13. Confedneck

    Confedneck 3/4 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    [ QUOTE ]
    [ QUOTE ]
    If you shoot off firework's yearound



    [/ QUOTE ]
    Hey what's wrong with that? /forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif

    [/ QUOTE ]

    nothin... i resemble that comment and have been lighting off 2.5" mortars since wednesday... lol
     
  14. bryguy00b

    bryguy00b 3/4 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif lol that was really good! HAHA /forums/images/graemlins/rotfl.gif
     
  15. jarheadk5

    jarheadk5 1/2 ton status

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    Re: You Know You\'re a Redneck When...

    [ QUOTE ]
    You burn your yard rather than mow it .


    [/ QUOTE ]

    Seen WAY too much of this here in Eastern NC over the past year-and-a-half...
     

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