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You might be a mech if...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by 454k30, Feb 13, 2007.

  1. 454k30

    454k30 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    Some guys and I at the hanger came up with some foxworthy knock-offs. It was originaly job specific for our rating (aviation machinist mate), but I thought that it works well here too!

    So you might be a mechanic if...

    -you have to wash your hands before you pee.

    -you think the black fingerprints on your sandwich add flavor.

    -you've seen your name on a meineke shirt.

    -you have torque values tattooed on your arm so you can set your calibrated elbow.

    -your name is two letters (JJ, JD)

    These are just a couple. What do you guys have?
     
  2. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    You can taste the difference between oil and hydraulic fluid


    or...

    You can taste the difference between jp-8 and oil
     
  3. ryoken

    ryoken Puppy Fabricator Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    Your toolbox costs more than your household furniture...

    You think of engines when you get change... $3.83, $4.54, etc...
     
  4. 454k30

    454k30 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    -you can taste the difference between JP-5 and JP-8!
     
  5. wasted wages

    wasted wages 3/4 ton status

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    you could recite the firing order of a small block before you could count to 10. (18436572)

    You tool account payment is higher than your mortage payment.
     
  6. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    You've used the phrase "It's okay sir, that's just residual" more than once on the same walkaround.

    Edit:

    You guys still use JP-5? :confused:
     
  7. 76zimmer

    76zimmer Flyin Rat Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    Excellent...
    how bout:

    your more worried about how clean your garage floor is than your kitchen floor
     
  8. mikey_d05

    mikey_d05 1 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    I do that with everything, change, time, random number, etc. :doah:
     
  9. 454k30

    454k30 1/2 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    have too on the boat when were home its 8. had to burn the old school jp-4 when we first got to Afghanistan.

    - you can tell the size of a nut or bolt by just looking at it.
     
  10. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    You know what make a vehicle is by the sound of the motor

    You know the make of a vehicle by engine size - happened to me yesterday, sat at a table and two co-workers come up and I head "It's got a 318", my respone "You have a dodge?"
     
  11. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    You have the sizes of all AN fittings memorized
     
  12. wasted wages

    wasted wages 3/4 ton status

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    You find a truck that hasn't moved in 15 years has no cylinder heads, the engine block is full of water,, the transmission and transfer case are sitting on the floor board in 1000 pieces and think to yourself,,,I bet I can get this running by next weekend.
     
  13. mikey_d05

    mikey_d05 1 ton status GMOTM Winner

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    I won $20 last week. Heard a diesel starting in the parking lot.

    "Bet it's a powerstroke"

    "What the?"

    "$20 says it's a PSD"

    "You're on."

    :D
     
  14. Chevy305

    Chevy305 6 Lug 14bsf Status Premium Member GMOTM Winner

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    ... You recognize people by what car they drive

    ... You can recognize bad gas by smell. (I Do it everyday ;) )

    ... You constantly under estimate the time it takes to do a job
     
  15. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    Happens to me at work a lot :(

    Somehow I take a 3-hour job, tell someone it'll take me 30 mintues, then do it in 1.5 hours. :confused:
     
  16. burban89'sgirl

    burban89'sgirl 1/2 ton status

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    you idea of kink involves jumper cables and a screwdriver :D
     
  17. garlicbreath

    garlicbreath 1/2 ton status

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    Your girlfriend stops to take a breath, looks up at you and says "ew, it tastes like motor oil"
     
  18. burban89'sgirl

    burban89'sgirl 1/2 ton status

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    brings new phrase to dip stick :haha: :haha:
     
  19. Jagged

    Jagged 1 ton status

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    AHEM

    Beaver Oil Extractor
     
  20. thezentree

    thezentree 3/4 ton status

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    Diesels are easy!
     

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