Actual Instruction Labels... ON A HAIR DRYER: Do not use while sleeping. ON A BAG OF FRITOS: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. ON A BAR OF DIAL SOAP: Directions: Use like regular soap. ON A FROZEN DINNER: Serving suggestion: Defrost. ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP: Fits one head. ON TESCO'S TIRAMISU DESERT: Do not turn upside down. (Printed on the bottom of the box.) ON MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING: Product will be hot after heating. ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON: Do not iron clothes on body. ON BOOTS CHILDRENS' COUGH MEDICINE: Do not drive car or operate machinery. ON NYTOL (A SLEEP AID): Warning: may cause drowsiness. ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE: Warning keep out of children. ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS: For indoor or outdoor use only. ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR: Not to be used for the other use. ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS: Warning: contains nuts. ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.