Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb? Just one, but it takes the entire emergency room to get it out! What's the definition of a teenager? God's punishment for enjoying sex. Hear the slogan for the Stealth Condom? They'll never see you coming. What do you call kinky sex with chocolate? S&M&M. What does Kodak film have in common with condoms? Both capture the moment. Define Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink, and be Mary! Why is being in the military like a blowjob? The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel. What do you call twelve naked men sitting on each other's shoulders? A scrotum pole! What's the ultimate in rejection? When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep. Why don't debutantes go to orgies? There'd be too many thank-you notes to write. What did the Indian say when the white man tied his penis in a knot? ''How come?'' What is every Amish woman's private fantasy? Two Mennonite! Why is sex like a game of bridge? If you have a good hand, you don't need a partner. Can you say three two-letter words that denote small? Is it in? What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? One... Men will screw anything.