so i have a friend at school that i study statics with and she is clearly a lesbian. now, i don't know how to refer to her in the third person, as she clearly takes on the "man" persona. if i need to explain to someone what she's saying, i'm afraid to refer to her in a situation like this: "so what she's saying is..." i think i just need to ask her how she prefers to be called, but that's an odd situation i've never dealt with before. i'm also slightly concerned b/c she knows i'm a hard-core christian and i'm afraid she'll think i'm judging her, and if i'm honest, i suppose i do judge her lifestyle because i do think it's morally wrong. however, i've got no problem with her has a person, and i want her to know that. anyway, i just don't want to turn her off to working with me because we work really well together at processing these problems for statics. how would you handle this situation tactfully?