A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin. "Where the hell have you been?" she asked. "You'll have to pack all your things, dear," he said. "I've just lost you in a card game." "How did you manage to do that, genius?" she asked sarcastically. "It wasn't easy... honest," he told her. "I had to fold with a royal flush."