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Just some rambling, no need to read..

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by BIG*RED, Oct 17, 2005.

  1. BIG*RED

    BIG*RED 1/2 ton status

    Mar 14, 2003
    Likes Received:
    so its been a little while since i got out of the hospital. And honestly I physically feel better than i have in well over a year. I met a great couple that have opened up their house to me. Keep me well fed, warm, and constantly make sure i'm "ok". and they don't even charge me rent. for the most part things are going good for me for once.

    so why do i feel so.....gray?

    i no longer watch tv, for it makes me sad. I used to love music, but i no longer listen to music anymore because it to makes me sad. the couple i am staying with wanted to take me out to a moive last night. but i didn't go because the thought of going to see a movie made me sad. Even the blazer, dare i say, makes me sad. I don't like being in it anymore. honestly i dont like even looking at it. i have gotten to the point that i don't even like cars any more. a friend of the couple that i'm staying with, came over last night and had a porsche. it was a real nice looking one. shinney black..asked me if i wanted the keys and take it for a spin...what did i say?..."nah, thats ok"

    so what gives? things are going good, i'm relativly healthy. i feel good. i have everything that i need. so why is everything making me sad? why dont i want to do anything? why do i avoid everything?

    i don't know, i'm just rambling on here. it just doesn't make any sense to me.. :confused:
  2. bobalob

    bobalob 1/2 ton status

    Jul 20, 2005
    Likes Received:
    Everson, Washington
    sounds like a serotonin deficiency or absorption problem :(
  3. Russell

    Russell LB7 Tahoe Status Premium Member GMOTM Winner

    Jun 23, 2000
    Likes Received:
    Fort McMurray, Alberta
    Definitely sounds like a chemical imbalance! Its quite possibly one of the drugs you are on affecting the receptor sites in your neurons -- Next chance you get, ask the doctors if there is any way to balance it out?

    Don't let it get too severe, cause it can get far worse if you arn't careful!
  4. Roz

    Roz 1/2 ton status

    Mar 27, 2005
    Likes Received:
    San Diego
    well if it counts any, im truly happy to hear that the situation is getting better. after being through the social trails u have(not to mention everything else) i would be (and have been) burned out too. might take some time- dont be hard on ureself. u noticed so i say give it a little time of some *normal(?)* interaction and friendship and it will wear off. bring it up to the DR though, there might be physicaly something wrong as bob and sierra said.

    still keeping u in our thoughts
  5. diesel4me

    diesel4me 1 ton status Premium Member

    Jul 24, 2003
    Likes Received:
    I feel the same...!!(more rambling!!)

    I am in the same boat,but for different reasons--my situation at home with my ailing mother is a bad one at best..the price of gas and no income to speak of keeps me cooped up at home,and none of my "friends" ever come to my house,unless they need something..she's sick and could die anyday now..I have no money to speak of,no job,and I haven't felt well at all..

    I've been very sick the past two months,(bronchitis,and a lung infection)-so I don't feel like doing anything,never mind all the chores I've had to let slide that need to be done before it winter really sets in..just started feeling good enough to start doing some light work the past few days,but I still feel kinda lousy..probably from all the inactivity lately..

    I just get to the point where nothing seems to please me anymore...I try to work,I feel sore and tired,get chest pains....I haven't even changed my oil in months--and don't feel like doing even that!..I seem to screw up more things than I fix lately..
    I go outside and try to enjoy a nice sunny day,and some peace and quiet--the nieghbors dogs are barking incessantly,and wont STFU!! for hours on end..--or the other one is mowing his lawn,or using his leafblower at 7 am on sunday morning--when the wind was gusting to 50 mph! :screwy: :yikes: --then the sirens on ambulances going by on the highway every five minites..drives me nuts!--seems like everywhere go,people cut me off,or pull stupid stunts in traffic too.. :mad: We just had 8 days of rain in a row,so thats got me in a down mood too..always hurts more when the weather sucks!.. :mad:

    I love music,its about the only thing I get enthused about anymore--going to concerts and meeting some of the artists--have gotten to know a few quite well..its the only thing I look forward too in life..but gas and tickets cost a lot of money,and lately its been pretty tough for me to make any money..When going to the concerts started feeling more like a burden than fun,thats when I knew my life was really in a tailspin,and I had better do something about it--and fast!..

    So I'm trying to be more optomistic,and not so negative..I'm not a negative person usually--but my suroundings and they way other people act around here gets me pretty pessemistic in a hurry..I can't say I've walked in your shoes,but I bet we take the same size--I think I have a good idea how you feel..don't worry,it usually passes..sometimes slowly,and sometimes you snap out of it suddenly..its all a part of being human I guess..you can't understand what "happy" is until you spent some time unhappy..but the dark always turns to light with each new day..until some SOB comes along and spoils it! :doah: :crazy:

    Hang in there Bud..One day at a time..something will come along and make you happy..you just ain't found it yet.. :crazy:
  6. Desert Rat

    Desert Rat Fetch the comfy chair

    Oct 19, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Tri-Valley, NorCal
    Both you guys need to get laid.

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