The story of Nick the Dragon Slayer! Nick the Dragon Slayer was an official in King Arthur's court. He had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this would be death. One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor. Horatio the Physician explained that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it. Without pause, Nick readily agreed to have Horatio arrange it, and that he would gladly pay the 1,000 gold coins for the chance to satisfy his desires for the Queen. The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and poured a little bit into the Queen's massive brassiere while she was taking a bath. Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch. Further, tests of the King's court had shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer had present the antidote to cure the itch. King Arthur quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts. The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and as a hero of the Kingdom. Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer - knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King - shooed him away with no payment made. The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into King Arthur's loincloth. King Arthur quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer... MORAL OF THE STORY: Pay yer fookin' bills!