Sexually harassment on Snapchat

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by 454Sub, Oct 12, 2017.

  1. 454Sub

    454Sub 5/8 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2012
    Posts:
    2,731
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    Location:
    Southern Illinois
    Build(s):
    1
    Well something I sort of expected in reality has finally happened. My daughter is being sexually harassed by a little asshole on her bus and at school. Her friends sent her some screen shots of Snapchat (which is a totally stupid app that Madison does not have) with pictures of her and some extremely ignorant comments.

    Since the boy is in 8th grade I am not allowed to enter the bus and snap his arm like he deserves, adding to his little assholeness he also bully's a bunch of kids on said bus. I now have to drive up to the school today and sort this mess out. The messages are simply rediculous, and no father wants to see a picture of his 6th grade daughter with the caption"ready for some dick".

    The poor girl has lost her mother to a federal drug charge, and she won't be out till after Madison graduates high school, she's realizing most of her family on her mom's side is scumbags as well. She's really into the school that is in my district, went from missing a minimum of 40 days a year to zero so far since I have had custody. But this situation has her severely embarrassed and not wanting to go to school.
     
  2. AJs72K5

    AJs72K5 blub-blub-blub-blub Premium Member GMOTM Winner

    Joined:
    Sep 20, 2007
    Posts:
    1,905
    Likes Received:
    410
    Location:
    South Tx
    Build(s):
    1
    That's a tough one, but way to stay on top of it Dad. There's very little tolerance for bullying and cyberbullying now. The school needs to step in.
     
    GWeakland620 and rdn2blazer like this.
  3. F.S.F.W

    F.S.F.W Caught up in the movement Premium Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2016
    Posts:
    6,206
    Likes Received:
    6,027
    Location:
    Douglas Wyoming
    Build(s):
    1
    Just FYI they do have electronic forensics that can pull up everything that has been said on Snapchat. Just because the pics don’t last doesn’t mean they vanish. I would take this to the police. We have dealt with some of this same crap.
     
    Big Ray and rdn2blazer like this.
  4. skunked

    skunked in the garage Premium Member GMOTM Winner

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2013
    Posts:
    10,371
    Likes Received:
    9,026
    Location:
    Placer County CA
    Build(s):
    2
    Little shitheads.

    I hope you get a good response from the school.
     
    rdn2blazer likes this.
  5. YOUNGBLOOD13

    YOUNGBLOOD13 Registered Member Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2016
    Posts:
    58
    Likes Received:
    17
    Tough road ahead. Be prepared, mentally, to find the school actually do nothing. We've been through it. Best of luck
     
  6. rdn2blazer

    rdn2blazer 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2004
    Posts:
    18,015
    Likes Received:
    2,731
    Location:
    So Cal.
    Bet his parents will be like, "What? Its no big deal." Bullcrap its no big deal!!! Kids kill themselves over this shat!!! IT IS A Very BIG deal! Great job Dad. Protect your little girl! :waytogo:. Get her into a self defence class or teach her yourself. Get her punching on a heavy bag. SOMEthing to allow her to vent Her frustration. Don't let this stew in her. NOT healthy. Young kids don't know how to cope with this stuff. Especially going thru it for maybe the first time.

    I've told it here before. When my kid was being bullied he finally just let loose on the kid. My sons Ju Jitsu training helped him BIG time. Little shat grabbed my kid, my boy said he just reacted just like his training taught him basically. Took the kid down with a sweep and snapped his color bone driving him to the concrete.

    His parants came to the school. Ended up being he was bullying my kid and others. His parents said to their kid basically you got what you deserved. School contacted us of course but said apparently they are good parents do not want Any further action. Said their kid was taught a lesson about picking on other kids.

    Never touched my son again. Lesson leasned. Fock with people, you may end up with a broken bone. Bullies are A**holes who do deserve what they get.
     
  7. 454Sub

    454Sub 5/8 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2012
    Posts:
    2,731
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    Location:
    Southern Illinois
    Build(s):
    1
    We shall see. I sincerely hope that it's resolved without the police. After calming down and thinking about it I have no idea what's going on at the boys home. I don't want an abused boy who is lashing out at anyone and anything to get an even more raw deal. So I'm waiting on the superintendent and principal and ect and then I will decide.

    At the bare minimum I want a meeting with the parents and the boy to issue an apology to her. It's unacceptable behavior from him either way. If the school isn't receptive to these demands then I will probably involve the police. Showing up at the parents house unannounced has me nervous for many reasons.
     
    Big Ray and rdn2blazer like this.
  8. rdn2blazer

    rdn2blazer 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2004
    Posts:
    18,015
    Likes Received:
    2,731
    Location:
    So Cal.
    Let your daughter Know it IS ok to be frustrated and feel angry. But its HOW you handle it thats important. You Don't want her internalizing it. That leads to "cutting" and drug use to mask or hide the pain and anger. Can lead to a lot of bad things.
     
    Big Ray likes this.
  9. rdn2blazer

    rdn2blazer 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jun 9, 2004
    Posts:
    18,015
    Likes Received:
    2,731
    Location:
    So Cal.
    I would not reccommend showing up at their house. Police first. Thats just inviting trouble your way.
     
  10. diesel4me

    diesel4me 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2003
    Posts:
    19,543
    Likes Received:
    2,052
    Location:
    Massachussetts
    I agree--I'd call a lawyer,find out your rights regarding this issue,before confronting the parents or the kid,it might save you a trip to jail,and the parents will likely take action,if they know they can be sued..resist the temptation to shove that kids cell phone up his anus..

    The 12 year old nephew of a guy I know in the next town over has made the local news--last week,a 13 year old kid he was friends with evidently had a falling out,and he started bullying the 12 year old on facebook--the 12 year old was confronted by the 13 year old ,along with some friends of his at his home one day after school,they were going to beat him up--he went in the house,got his mom's .22 rifle out of her gun safe,and shot the "bully" in the side--went thru his arm,and he lost a part of his colon...now the kid is being held without bail..

    Bullying and harassment is nothing to ignore--it often leads to violence..I've related my own experiences here with bullies in grade school,and how I almost ended up killing one with a large rock,when he kept beating me up in school,(especially in gym class),and stalked me every day on my walk home..one day I'd had enough,and I grabbed a large flat rock off a stone wall,slate I think,and I busted it in half over his head..
    My parents were threatened by his physically,then they said they were going to sue--but the father of the bully decided not to press charges after he heard what his son had done for several months leading up to my retaliation..my dad also said he'd beat the crap out of him too,if he did!..he was a pretty rugged guy,and not many people were willing to mess with him,or piss him off!..
     
  11. newyorkin

    newyorkin 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2001
    Posts:
    17,048
    Likes Received:
    721
    Location:
    Los Estados Unitos

    I'd say first, reassure her that this is a small part of her life. If she lives to 80, this period, even if it lasted a year, is a fraction of the time she'll be on earth.
    Second, tell her the power is in her hands, not his. She knows the truth despite anything that's said about her, knows you have her back, and can respond to this kid with strength. Ignore him and separate herself as much as possible, or confront him continually until she's a pain in his arse. I know this stuff is way easier said than done, but saying it will plant nuggets of belief in it.
    My son made me proud as heck one day when he walked up to a bully that was harassing someone and decked him. The kid he was helping out never had a problem again. The bully meekly threatened my son with a fight, but withered away after a while, obviously put in his place but not liking it.

    I'm also compassionate toward someone that's receiving abuse that drives them to behave poorly, but you really can't know and respond to that. What you *can* respond to is what you know, which is that this kid is wholly inappropriate and unfair to your kid.

    It's not right, but I'd love to tell you to have her send a snap response "Not ready for tiny dick, though. That's why [little a-hole] missed out." But I'm a dad of a girl, and that's still leaving too much of a door open. It's also totally immature and junior-high level...

    Social media sucks. It's augmentiing the sh***iness of humans toward each other.
     
  12. skunked

    skunked in the garage Premium Member GMOTM Winner

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2013
    Posts:
    10,371
    Likes Received:
    9,026
    Location:
    Placer County CA
    Build(s):
    2
    Take the first step with the school, don't worry about plan B until plan A is exhausted. I have a 5th grade daughter so I can somewhat imagine your anger.....
     
    F.S.F.W likes this.
  13. runamok151

    runamok151 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Oct 24, 2005
    Posts:
    13,455
    Likes Received:
    3,188
    Location:
    Chapel Hill, TN
    I never understand why people go to the school for stuff like this unless it's something that happens at school or using school computers. I understand they're school mates and that her friends are showing her while she's on the bus, but that doesn't necessarily mean that it happened on school time. He could have posted it at 9PM the previous evening from his bedroom and the bus is just the first opportunity they had to tell her. The schools do not have responsibility or control over students 24/7.

    Does her school have a school resource officer who is a real police officer? If they do, that's who you should report it to, not some assistant principal or flunky disciplinarian. If no SRO, you should definitely report it to your local police. This is a criminal and possibly civil matter (harassment), not a school discipline problem. I've handled many of these cases, even went through it w/ two of my own nieces. In some cases it even had to involve state police and Secret Service because the communications happened across state lines.

    This is exactly why I think kids shouldn't have phones at such young ages. They're too young to handle the social interaction and responsibilities that go along w/ them. A parent may think their kid is responsible enough to conduct themselves properly w/ a phone. Most of the kids on the other end of the line are not.
     
  14. 454Sub

    454Sub 5/8 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2012
    Posts:
    2,731
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    Location:
    Southern Illinois
    Build(s):
    1
    The pictures were taken and posted on the bus, during the ride to school. So by the time stamps from the post, it happened on school time. Him telling her to suck his dick, she would look good on it, and other shit that I dont feel like regurgitating on here while on the bus is why I'm involving the school. I want the kid off the bus for a few days or weeks or forever.

    And like I said, I don't want to involve the police until I have no other alternative. The school (IMO) has zero reason to not support my simple demands.
     
    runamok151 and rdn2blazer like this.
  15. Abusfullofnuns

    Abusfullofnuns 1/2 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Dec 21, 2016
    Posts:
    154
    Likes Received:
    86
    Build(s):
    1
    crazy town. i'm not looking forward to this part of fatherhood. i have 6yo and 4yo little girls and don't know how i'll be able to handle something like this incident. i think you've been given some solid advice. maybe you just need to find the ninth grade bullies and buy them a carton of smokes to help with an attitude adjustment.
     
  16. 454Sub

    454Sub 5/8 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2012
    Posts:
    2,731
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    Location:
    Southern Illinois
    Build(s):
    1
    Well they went above and beyond. When I arrived back from the field trip with her the school police officer who is a town LEO had dragged the boy into the office, and both of his parents were there. His attitude had changed significantly I'm assuming.

    He is banned from the bus for the rest of the year, had to apologise to her in front of me, the LEO, principal, his parents and my daughter. The LEO asked if charges were going to be pressed because the forms were already written up. His parents were not super thrilled, but I can kind of see that they aren't super great either. So I let the charges slide and decided not to do it. If it crops up again the LEO said the boy will be arrested for kids and charges will be filed.

    So I guess overall I'm as happy as possible. It was handled well by the school, and now they are going to give a packet out and a school meeting thing for social media dangers and sexual harassment. And I didn't have to rip his arm out of his shoulder socket and insert it into his ass. So today chalks up as a solid win.
     
  17. newyorkin

    newyorkin 1 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2001
    Posts:
    17,048
    Likes Received:
    721
    Location:
    Los Estados Unitos
    Awesome news! Good job getting it done and showing her prompt action.
     
    rdn2blazer likes this.
  18. -stew-

    -stew- 1/2 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2010
    Posts:
    2,963
    Likes Received:
    1,632
    Location:
    Kilwaukee, Wiscompton
    Build(s):
    1
    Where is the line between bullying, and kids being assholes to each other?
     
  19. 454Sub

    454Sub 5/8 ton status Premium Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2012
    Posts:
    2,731
    Likes Received:
    1,076
    Location:
    Southern Illinois
    Build(s):
    1
    I honestly can't answer that. I'm a firm believer in kids should fight it out sometimes. But I think the line is firmly drawn right before legit sexual harassment. I never want her to believe that all she is worth is that. And he shouldn't believe that's how women deserve to be treated.
     
  20. skunked

    skunked in the garage Premium Member GMOTM Winner

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2013
    Posts:
    10,371
    Likes Received:
    9,026
    Location:
    Placer County CA
    Build(s):
    2
    So far I've only had issues with other girls, or little bitches I should say. Some parents have zero control of their kids and the kids have zero respect for others.

    Depends who you ask. I feel like most of it is kids being assholes and are in need a good reality check.
     
    Big Ray, fastazz81 and rdn2blazer like this.

Share This Page