Stella Awards

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by ABO, Jan 8, 2003.

  1. ABO

    ABO Registered Member

    Jan 16, 2001
    Likes Received:
    The Burgh
    It's time once again to consider candidates for the annual Stella Awards.
    The "Stella's" are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot
    coffee on herself and then successfully sued McDonalds!
    Her case inspired awards for the most frivolous, yet somehow successful,
    lawsuits in the U.S. The following are this year's candidates:

    7. Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a
    night club in a neighboring city after she fell off the bathroom window
    to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. This occurred while Kara
    trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the
    $3.50 cover charge. Kara was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

    6. Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 plus
    medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door
    neighbor's beagle. The beagle was actually on a chain in his neighbor's
    fenced yard. The award was less than Jerry had sought, perhaps because
    the jury felt the dog might have been provoked by Jerry, who had been
    repeatedly shooting at it with a pellet gun.

    5. 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000, plus medical
    expenses, when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord.
    Carl apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car
    as he tried to steal the hub caps.

    4. A Philadelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of
    Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and
    broke her coccyx (that's a tailbone, folks). The soda was on the floor
    because Amber had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier.

    3. (my favorite) Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, finished
    a house and
    then tried to leave by way of the garage. Terry was not able to open the
    garage door because the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He
    couldn't reenter the house because the door connecting the house and
    garage locked when he pulled it shut. Since the family was then on
    Terry became locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on
    a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food. Terry sued claiming this
    situation caused him undue mental anguish, and a jury agreed to the tune
    of $500,000.

    2. Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury
    when she broke her ankle in a furniture store by tripping over a toddler
    had been running around the store. The store owners were understandably
    surprised at the verdict, considering the toddler was Kathleen's own son.

    1. This year's favorite could easily be Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma
    Oklahoma. Merv purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On
    his first trip, he drove onto the freeway, set the cruise control to 70
    calmly left the driver's seat and went into the back to make a cup of
    Surprisingly, the RV left the freeway and crashed! Merv sued Winnebago
    not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't really do this.
    jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually
    changed its manual on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any
    complete morons buying recreation vehicles.
  2. Goober

    Goober 1/2 ton status

    Apr 26, 2002
    Likes Received:
    Mayberry (Auburn, WA)
    Details can be found HERE.

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