teds new tv show /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif /forums/images/graemlins/peace.gif Ted's 10, Or Actually 14, Commandments "God left it up to me to make sense of all this s**t." - The Nuge 1. Thou shalt salute and honor thy Nuge or thou shalt risk thy chance of having a cattle prod shoved up thy ass. 2. Thou shall not look nor speak nor covet Shemane or thou shalt find thy testicles Nuge-a-tized. 3. If thou smoketh cigarettes on my property thou wilt be forced to give my canine a scrotal massage. 4. Thou shall not blow smoke up Ted's ass, or anyones ass for that matter, it's unsanitary and disgusting. 5. Thou shalt not kill without a tasty marinade of garlic and butter. 6. Thou shalt not forget the American f***ing dream. 7. Thou shalt not go a day without a Nuge-a-tized serving from my rock and roll twanger. 8. Thou shalt embrace Full Bluntal Nugent-y. 9. Thou shalt not kill. Unless some motherf****r is coming into your house to take your s**t! 10. Thou shalt not bear false witness against the Nuge. 11. Honor your father and mother but worship your master Ted. 12. Thou shall not steal unless you want to win the competition. 13. Thou shall not take the name of Ted in vain. 14. Six days you shall work but on the seventh day, Ted shall work you harder.