1. When working on someone's computer, whatever happens, behave as though you meant it to happen. 2. The more you understand an operating system the closer it is to becoming obsolete. 3. Free online help from a software vendor is deliberately engineered to cause enough frustration as to trick the mind into paying for expensive training classes. 4. When the going gets tough, reinstall. 5. For every computer problem there is an upgrade with equal and opposite problems. 6. To err is human . . . to blame your mistake on the computer department is downright human nature. 7. He who laughs last probably made a backup. He who laughs too loud hasn't checked his backups in a while. 8. If at first you do not succeed, blame it on the software or a virus. 9. A complex system that does not work is invariably found to have evolved from a simpler system that worked just fine. 10. The number one cause of computer problems is computer solutions. 11. A computer program will always do what you tell it to do, but rarely what you want to do. 12. Upgrading causes more problems then it solves.