I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes. *** Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant. **** The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement. *** There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead. *** Life is sexually transmitted. *** An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys. *** If quitters never win, and winners never quit, then who is the fool who said, "Quit while you're ahead?" *** Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.. *** Some people are like Slinkies. not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs *** Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. *** Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again. *** All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. *** Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents? *** In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal. *** Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. *** How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? *** AND THE # 1 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: You read about all these terrorists most of them came here legally, but they hung around on these expired visas, some for as long as 10 -15 years. Now, compare that to Blockbuster; you are two days late with a video and those people are all over you. Let's put Blockbuster in charge of immigration!