Ways to tell if your a gearhead...

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Ryan B., Mar 12, 2002.

  1. Ryan B.

    Ryan B. 3/4 ton status GMOTM Winner

    Jul 18, 2001
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    I posted this a LONG time ago but still get a kick reading it...

    Ways to Tell if You're a Gearhead /forums/images/icons/smile.gif

    1. You follow the customs signs in the airport looking for a car show
    2. You judge the character of people by the rides they choose
    3. You think everyone else does too
    4. You eat at fancy restaurants so you can wander around the parking lot
    5. You know the name of every car you see on the road
    6. Even the Hyundais, (Lord knows why)
    7. Any full throttle engine sound will cause you to spin violently in its direction, looking for a glimpse of the action
    8. When asked how your day went, you quickly list the coolest cars you saw that day and leave it at that
    9. You have more magazines than the local library, and theyre all about cars
    10. You dont ever throw the old magazines away, because there might be something useful in there
    11. They are piling up higher than the chair in which you read them
    12. They ARE the chair in which you read them
    13. You garage contains at least a dozen parts that your family cant name
    14. There are always partially disassemble parts hanging around the garage..
    15. Except when you bring them into the kitchen or living room
    16. Shop rags rank higher on the grocery list than toilet paper
    17. Your driveway, and the street in front of your house have seen more burnouts than the local dragway
    18. As a kid, you loved the smell of gasoline
    19. You still do
    20. If using gasoline to start a fire, youd by 94 octane, just to be sure
    21. Youve owned a car that required opening the hood and possibly losing a finger or two in order to start it.
    22. You thought that was cool
    23. So did your friends
    24. You know the truth about why guys like cars so much
    25. And you know that women just dont get it, cause when they make engine noises they sound like hondas
    26. You on the other hand have perfected your small block scream, and your big block rumble, and use them whenever chance allows
    27. You hear an engine wind up as a car takes of from a stoplight, but you dont turn around to look because you know by the sound that its just a mustang
    28. When a cop comes tearing up behind you with his lights on, you think he wants to race
    29. Youre asked to draw a floor plan of your dream home, and you start with the garage/shop complex
    30. And thats all you draw
    31. You name parts of your yard the ring lands, and the lifter valley
    32. You try to discuss bodily injuries using terms like connecting rod, linkage, bushing, adhesive, and JB weld
    33. Shaved, Frenched, blown, rubber, on the floor, sectioned, dropped etc are all automotive terms to you
    34. You keep a timeslip in your wallet
    35. Youve thought about using your dog as a walking shop rag
    36. But you use your cat instead cause he fits under the car better and hes self cleaning
    37. You over hear some teen complaining about breaking out and you think hes been bracket racing
    38. You can read the Summit Racing catalog every month and never get sick of it
    39. When told that there was a knock on the door, you respond well retard the timing
    40. You know every straightaway in your town, and you know how fast you can get going on each one of them
    41. You flinch when the wreck a nice car in a movie
    42. You seriously contemplate adding a nitrous system to the family minivan
    43. But you put it on the lawn mower instead
    44. You involuntarily burst into laughter when car commercials brag about having a powerful V6 engine
    45. Passengers routinely exit your car feeling dizzy, nauseous, and wondering what happened to the past four miles.
    46. When you hear the letters IRS, you think about cool suspensions
    47. Youd rather have 5 points and a roll cage than airbags and a 5 star crash rating
    48. Every time the clock reads 3:27, 3:50 or 4:54, you make engine noises.or at least imagine them

    Funny I can relate to most all of these...
    Anyone else. /forums/images/icons/smile.gif
  2. dogman

    dogman 1/2 ton status

    Oct 31, 2001
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    California, Santa Clara Co.
    I can't get to my tool box, do you know where the allan wrenchs are??
    thanks for the PIC "test it" now!
  3. Burbinator

    Burbinator 1/2 ton status

    Sep 14, 2001
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    Tempe, Arizona
    Guilty, guilty, guilty...to most of them. I'm sure there would be more if I had more time!
  4. Ddragggon

    Ddragggon 1/2 ton status

    Apr 25, 2001
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    Hartford, WI (formerly Etiwanda, SoCal)
    a couple more to add...

    -you can name the day, and place all your vehicles were manufactured, but you forget when your wedding anneversary is.
    -you buy mostly black clothign to keep it from getting ruined, and grease stained..
    -it somehow gets ruined the 3rd time you wear it
    -you think its normal for fingernails to have a layer of black crud under them
    -you home in on any vehicle with its hood up, to see if you can help
    -you not only can help, you do, and get it fixed, using spare parts in the back of your truck,
    -your friends call you when they have car troubles, day or night
    -you've been unable to sleep designing the perfect rock crawler driveline in your head,
    -you've got more engines, then vehicles
    -the people at the MVD know you by name ( been there.... )
    -you know thier names too (done that)
    -when asked what you want for christmas, you launch into your engine buildup parts, then get upset when you get a tie, or a Tshirt instead.
    -you've piloted and raced nearly everything with wheels on it, includig bicycles, shopping carts, strollers, walkers, and bar stools.
    -you've got a higher win then loss rate in all these categories
    -you've raced in Demo derby's before
    -no one knows your real name, but rather refers to you as `ratchet' `hot rod' `speedy' or some other auto associated name
    -you reply when called one of the above...

    blah, enough of that...

  5. muddysub

    muddysub 1 ton status Staff Member Moderator GMOTM Winner

    Jun 23, 2001
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    my garage, Henderson, NV
    GUITLY!! i can confess to most of those and i'm only 17.
    two more,
    -you don't wanna know how much money you have in tools.
    -you brag about how much money you have in tools.
  6. EDdaTREE

    EDdaTREE 1/2 ton status

    Feb 18, 2000
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    Austintown, OHIO
    You have a dog named "Holley."
  7. Twiz

    Twiz 1/2 ton status

    Mar 8, 2001
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    Clearfield Ut.
    - You can see a potentiial 12 seccond car, in all-most every car you see.
    - You spend hours thinking about how you would get it into the 10s.
  8. Ryan B.

    Ryan B. 3/4 ton status GMOTM Winner

    Jul 18, 2001
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    Twiztid- Now that rings a bell!!!

    Eddatree- I remember you mentioning that... "Naming your dog Holley" a long time ago when I posted this before.
  9. ntaj*ep

    ntaj*ep 1/2 ton status

    Feb 4, 2002
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    Evergreen state
    no...a dog named TJ..... (tahoe was in the running but didn't flow as well) the only one that troubles me is "shop rags rate higher than toilet paper on the grocery list" The rest........ya!
  10. Donna

    Donna 1/2 ton status

    Feb 20, 2001
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    Change #14 to read There are always partially disambled parts laying on the front porch or in the yard and you've just described my husband. LOL! ! ! Not to mention that # 9 and 10 are very much him as well ! ! ! ! # 38 should be changed to read you can read summit racing catalog everyday and not get sick of it to describe Wayne. I guess it is safe to sat that he is a TRUE Gear head! ! ! But i already knew that. I guess I just had to read the list to make sure. LOL! ! ! ! !

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