I have a diaphram style in my truck, 12", made by Sachs-Sedis(SP? Yes, the bike chain people) Anyways, it's been in there now probably 7 years at least, and still going strong. Not advocating that brand, just the diaphram style in general.
I only smoked it once, for some reason went temporarily brain dead, didn't shift gears after slowing down, went to accelerate, didn't move as fast as I thought it should, pushed pedal to the floor, eventually realized I was in the wrong gear as the engine RPM's gradually increased and the burned clutch smell started to permeate the cab.
That was probably 4 years ago and still no issues.
I figure my setup has to be fairly hard on the clutch, with only 3.42's and 33's, it takes a bit of slipping to get it moving smoothly. But it's easily done with that clutch.
I don't think I'd even consider a 3 finger unless I was towing some insane amount of weight, and even then I'd do some research to see if the 3 finger was required. I would imagine for wheeling a potential tradeoff in holding power/life would still be acceptable compared to better clutch control in general.