Man, sorry to hear about the shaft failure. The cause of it sucks too. I agree with Luke on the anaerobic sealer. Permatex 518 is the stuff that I use on machined flanges. Works great.
I have been nervous about fluid transfer from transmission to transfer case because of previous experience and similar experiences I have heard of. Other than checking the fluid regularly there is no real way to know, but I figured if something bad was happening the temperature of the fluid would increase. With that line of thinking, I decided to install a transmission temperature gauge. Now I'm not sure it will show a problem, but it has taught me a few things about lube temp in these transmissions. The first thing was how cool these things run under normal conditions. On a regular day, ripping down the road at pretty much any speed, it runs from 140-180*. Now if you throw a grade at it it will start climbing. If it is a hot day and we are pulling a 7* grade it will run up to 220* pretty easily. I have not got it over that, but my loaded weight is less than 8600lbs. One interesting point of that temperature is that it doesn't come back down. Once it hits a high temperature, it pretty much stays there until we shut it down for awhile (food stop, etc). Other than that it stays put. I could only imagine what the temperature does with the loads you run. Also, my motor is not turned up as far as yours, so that can get added into the equation too.
Now, would I run a cooler on it?? Not sure on that. I actually have looked into them before, but the fast coolers are sold in pairs and I can't run one on the passenger side due to the front driveshaft being right there. If I could have bought just one I probably would have put one on. One thing I do have is one of the filter kits that Quad4x4 sells. In a conversation with Dan, he highly recommended it to me and using only that as a reason, I installed it. I have to say I was very impressed with how dirty the filter was on the first service (and how clean the oil was). The oil was so clean that I actually saved it and put it back in the bottles and keep in the truck as "trail emergency" lube. It is an amazingly simple setup, but it works very well so I highly recommend it.
If you decide to get the cooler kit and only run one for driveshaft clearance issues or in lieu of a filter, let me know and I'll split the cooler kit with you.